What happens to breeders

I told you the other day that I got laid off from my job two days before I found out I was pregnant with The Goon Squad. I also live in Florida. What these two things add up to is the fact that I have been wearing the same pair of Birkenstocks every day for about two years. We don’t go many places (except football games lately) and I can wear sandals to those anyway. I also have a pair of tennis shoes for walking and a pair of black heels that I don’t have to wear very often.

My point is, I haven’t bought a pair of shoes in over two years. I know it sounds crazy, but I really haven’t.

So, are you guys familiar with the old myth that a woman’s feet will grow 1/2 of a shoe size with each child? It’s true.

I am 5′ 9″. I have big feet. Until last Friday, I was under the impression that I wore a size 10 shoe. Nope. Size 11. 42 in a Naot. 1/2 size per baby, even if you have them at the same time.

When I was a little kid, the guy a Buster Brown made a joke about me having to wear shoe boxes if my feet grew anymore. He wasn’t kidding. Poor Ian already wears a 6 1/2 or 7 – wide. Gabe’s Dad wears a 13 and my brother wears a 14. When Ian gets a little older we’re going to have to ask Shaq where he buys his shoes.

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  1. That’s one thing about living in Florida. Who needs real shoes?

  2. As is the case with 90% of life’s toughest questions, the answer here is a simple one:


    God bless flip-flops.

  3. Dan just mentioned the size of your feet yesterday!

  4. How odd. Dan should comment in here. Does he read this? Blogs are right up his alley.

    HI DAN! (Chad and Tiffany say hi)

  5. Dan’s response (after much laughter): “…aaaaahhhhhh, she remembered”!

  6. I went up with the Count but not the Princess. I wonder if there is anyway to shrink them back. I have all sorts of cute 6.5 shoes that no longer fit. Sad.

  7. Birkenstocks?


  8. My buddy has 10 brothers and sisters. His mom buys her shoes from Ronald McDonald. (The set-up was there, but the punchline? BAH!)

  9. That woman in Arkansas with 16 kids? She must shop at the same place then.

  10. Can I have your 10’s that don’t fit?? My feet also grew, but about 1/4 size per child.

  11. I just got to thinking … if the 1/2-size per child thing were true? Good grief. I’d be wearing almost a size 12 by now.

    My feet went back but my twin gut did not. I’d trade. I wouldn’t mind big feet.

  12. Roger – At least you tried.

    Steve – You try making two babies at once and see what shoes you wear.

    Tammy – Sure, but I don’t have anything very good.

  13. blessed are the flip flop makers, for they should go barefoot in floputopolis……okay, that’s the best i’ve got today…

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