Gabe has brought it to my attention that all the other bloggers have nicknames for their spouses and I just call him Gabe.

Erin has The Kaiser, BIYF has BIYM, Dad Gone Mad has Hot Wife and well, you get the point. Anyway, Gabe thinks he should have a better name. If it was up to him, he would be Der Kommissar.

I say that is too hard to spell.

Can you guys help a brother out?

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  1. You should call him Bega. I was watching the Monty Python thing on PBS the other night and they had the skit where Eric Idle speaks only in anagrams. Funny stuff.

  2. If you want to forgo the obvious Mr. Kotter idea… how about?

    -Elvis? (as in Costello. Here’s why:
    -Chuck E. Fiasco?
    -Bull? (He went to USF right? Photographic memory I have)

    I call my wife the wife, so I guess I need to come up with a nickname for her. Since my daughters are The Peanut Butter & The Jelly, I could call my wife White Bread…hmmm maybe not.

  3. E-bag?

  4. I say you just call him “Falco”. It’s one step closer to fulfilling his dream of carrying his master’s music to all corners of the interweb.

    Or, how about something related to his “soft spot band”, GWAR? Didn’t he take one of them to prom?

  5. Gabe also wanted me to tell everyone never to tell a German that Falco is from Germany.

    Apparently his is from Austria and Germans don’t appreciate the insult.

  6. I think you should call him
    I don’t know why – it just slays me.
    I can hear it now “And then Dancer said why don’t we all rock out to some Gwar?”
    – Brdgette

  7. I’m really going to have to think on this and get back to you. He is the one who called me “Queen of Spain” afterall.

    I’m guessing Mike Brady is out.

  8. I agree with the Germans. Austria sucks it.

  9. Umm, Sarge? Or how about Major Gabe? Major Dad? Major Major?

  10. I read on someone’s blog that they gave their husband a nickname because it made him more mysterious. I realized that I am not very mysterious, but I should be. I am thinking “Super Ninja” or “He Who Walks In Shadows” would darken my image a little bit.

  11. E-bag…


    think about it…

  12. i got it, but it takes me a while, Kemp. I’m really not that bright. I went to Florida public schools.

  13. Oh it has to be “Fluff Daddy”

  14. Eater of souls

  15. Super Ninja? Yeah. The Goon Squad could probably use one of those.


  17. It is from the same night at “Kick the Bill”.

  18. How about the Sergeant, or Sarge, because squad leaders usually are one.

  19. My Baby’s Daddy.

  20. What about “He We Do Not Speak Of?”

    Or you could adopt a Goth moniker….Azriel anyone?

    No one likes you, everyone misunderstands you and your music, Azriel. Go read some Byron…….

  21. Forlorn! He is sooo forlorn. Woe is Gabe…oopps, I mean Azriel.

  22. Gabe- I think that was on my blog. Or maybe someone else’s Hubby had the same idea, who knows. Personally I think you should go with something weird. But, unfortunetly, I am out of ideas.

  23. Perhaps we could just refer to him as “Falco Sucks It”.

    It’s sort of long…….yet still addresses the DER KOMMISAR factor.

    Didn’t Falco crash his car and die while trying to Freebase and drive at the same time?

  24. I STILL have re-occuring nightmares about Falco….der Komissar and the Twilight Zone freak me out……any other names????

  25. HOLY SH** ! I did not realize until just now (1:41AM on Friday Feb 25, 2006 that THE KAISER is Aaron!!!!!!!! That is me in the picture from 1991!!!!!!!! WOW!!!!!!!

  26. My own Nicknameless Husband has suggested that his nickname should be “SchlongMeister”.

    Perhaps he and Falco-Sucks-It can hang out some time.

  27. Of course I can only speak for myself, but saying Falco is German does not insult me.
    Interestingly, Falco was probably the very first person to ever rap in German, and most definitely the first to ever record it. Not that it had any influence on the development of German hip-hop culture, but he was still the first.
    Anyway, I suggest you call Gabe Herbert Keller, or maybe just Keller. More info here.

  28. I think it’s painfully obvious what Gabe’s name should be.

    He should be “The Gute.”

    I mean, he looks EXACTLY like Steve Gutenberg, after all.

  29. Mr. Hand,

    We can’t. Gabe’s iPod playlist is already called The Gutte (I think with umlats) and we might get confused.

  30. Yöü ärë dämn rïght ït häs ümläüts

  31. He is so Rock N Roll.

  32. You could put an umlaut over the A in Dancer.

  33. Okay, after the “you are damn right it has umlauts,” which may be the funniest response comment I’ve ever read, I propose that Gabe be known as “The Umlauter.”

    If you spell it backward, he becomes “The Retualmu.”

    Le Retualmu?

    Baron Umlaut!

    I’m just brainstorming here. Throw me a bone.

  34. I like it, but isn’t Umlauteer harder to spell that Der Kommissar?

    Oh sure – now I can spell both just fine.

  35. I like super ninja, because gabe does all those skits on

  36. Well, just call him Gäbe. Of course that doesn’t translate well into speaking, but that’s what’s so funny about it. It plays on the fact that you don’t actually have a nickname for him. How can I even find that funny? Sometimes I really worry about myself.

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