Just One of the Guys

I mentioned in my Father’s Day post that sometimes I feel like I fit in better with the guys than I do with the other Moms. Maybe it is because I would rather watch a James Bond movie marathon instead of any movie with Julia Roberts in it (except “Ocean’s 11”, but there is an exception to every rule).

The other night I couldn’t go to sleep and I started trying to figure out why the guys and I seem to relate to each other and here is what I came up with:

The Ways I Am the Same as the Dads*
1) I love football.
2) I love beer.
3) I don’t like romantic comedies.
4) I cannot understand why somebody would spend $1200 on a purse.
5) I have kids.
6) I think poop jokes are funny.

Other times, I really am a girl. I want to go to BlogHer, I was in a sorority (that is really girly, and I like pink. But here is the list I came up with showing the ways that I am not like Dads.

The Ways I Am Different From Dads**
1) I cried when I saw the press conference when Shaq announced he was leaving The Magic to go play for the lagers. I still haven’t forgiven him (even though rationally I completely understand why he left) and so I am rooting for the Mavericks.
2) I am strangely drawn to diamonds. I don’t know if it is the estrogen or what, but the day that Gabe and I got engaged I almost crashed my car trying to look at my ring while I was driving.
3) I have never mowed the lawn.
4) The day The Buccaneers announced that Jon Gruden would be Tony Dungy’s replacement I sent an e-mail out to all of my girlfriends that said “We have the dreamiest coach in the NFL”.
5) I am wearing pink underpants.
6) I cannot take Iron Maiden seriously.

* Don’t freak out. There are gross stereotypes and don’t apply to all Dads.
** Again, these are over-generalizations. You may have cried when Shaq left too. I don’t know.

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  1. I look at Iron Maiden and I see Spinal Tap. I don’t know why. Judas Priest is another one I can’t take seriously. I love Rob Halford but ever since he came out, that’s all I see now. It’s sad, I know.

    I’ve always gotten along better with the boys, maybe cause I hung around my military dad and his drinking buddies a lot. Who kknows. I know about sports, heavy metal and booze. I’m in good with most guys. They are more entertaining too.

    p.s. I haven’t mowed the lawn since I was 16 when my dad made me do it every week. You’re not missing anything.

  2. All of my friends in college were male – I blamed it on being in engineering. There was only one other female in our class (and yes, I’m friends with her, too!)

    And, not to start a fight here, but men are sometimes (usually) easier to get along with. You can say your piece and then move on without the other person melting into a puddle of tears or holding a grudge for 10 years.

    I hope this doesn’t start a riot.

  3. ruuuuuuuuuun….tooo the hilllllllls….!!!!!

    Eddie lives!

  4. Another way you’re not like the dads? Your vagina.

  5. I laughed at the diamond story.

    Of the 12 similarities and differences you scorred 11 with me.

  6. When guys get pissed at you it is over quickly, even when you kick their ass at air hockey. Women take shit way too personal. And it takes forever to get over it.

  7. I like poop jokes too–especailly if the words ‘squirt’ and ‘diarrhea’ are in there. And fart jokes.

    I too love diamonds and TOTALLY know what you’re talking about with the driving thing. I almost killed two pedestrians.

    And yeah, guys as friends are better than girls. Cuz we’re bitches.

    P.S. And which kid are you going to give me? I’d like to know so I can prepare.

  8. I’ve always had the opposite problem…I’ve always fit in with women better than men, always felt more comfortable with women than with men.

    Though I do enjoy the comraderie that exists among some of the father bloggers. It helps to feel a bit less isolated since I know no fathers in the real world that care or think about fathering like I do. I’m just strange that way, I guess.

  9. okay, i’m like a total anus for not stopping by more often.

    what’s goin’ on!

  10. I have never mowed a lawn. I hate Iron Maiden. I’m wearing pink boxers. And I cried when Patrick Ewing left the Knicks.

    Not sure what this says about me, Sarah. Either you’re my kind of girl or I’m you’re kind of guy.

    GO METS!

  11. You used to live in Tampa? I live in Tampa now. I miss Tony Dungy though. But then I miss the old sombrero stadium too. You could always get a seat.

  12. I long to scratch my nuts with the guys, but damn. I don’t have any.

    Like you, I love diamonds and poop jokes. We could totally hang.

  13. I never got into Iron Maiden either. I think it had something to do with Eddie.

  14. Wendy – I cried when they tore down Tampa Stadium too.

  15. Iron Maiden’s got some good songs! Sheesh!

  16. I’m with you. Particularly on the purse thing.

  17. I am also wearing pink underpants, and although I appreciate the need for poop jokes in soceity – I think that perhaps I am more girly girl than thou.
    I think you are secretly girly girl, though. I have SEEN your wedding pictures.
    Girly girl.

  18. I’m such a girl I had to do a search to see if Jon Gruden really was the dreamiest coach in the NFL. He’s pretty dreamy, alright. But I wasn’t sold at first since this was the first thing I found on him: http://espn.go.com/page2/s/hruby/030123.html

    Go Mavs!

  19. My sisters always call me the brother they never had. I love potty humor, sports, forgive and forget as soon as an apology is issued, and make decisions like a man–quickly and decisively (though that skill has taken a beating since I had the babies).

    However, in my personal style (dress, hair, jewelry, etc.), I am very girly.

    All my closest friends in high school and college were guys, and as an adult I’ve had to work hard at making friends with women. I often think working in a school full of women is sooooo much harder than it would be if it were all men.

  20. The boy in me also loves beer, but the girl in me says –

    Have you seen the HOTTIE that started Dogfish Head?!!!!

    http://www.beerhunter.com/documents/19133-001475.html

    I am local, so I get to see him in his very hot flesh every once in a while.

    I totally digressed.

  21. It must be pink panties day. And I don’t like pink.

    I thought the song about the dinosaurs roaming the earth was you favorite…

  22. First…Sarah, Wendy, I happen to have a piece from the Big Sombrero here if anyone wants to fondle it for a while. It will cost you though.

    Second, Gruden’s grumpy face is just the cutest! It makes me laugh. C’mon, how could anyone be scared of him?

    Third, I HATE PINK! It’s a DUMB color and should be forbidden to be seen in public. There. I said it. I’m a girl and I hate pink.

    Fourth, I love beer. And tequila. MMmmmmmmm…….Especially during a sporting event (like, um, football) with a hamburger in hand!

    Fifth, the diamond thing, I totally get. I don’t know why but, I do it to.

  23. and Oceans Twelve?

    I think this is why your corpus manufactured the one o’ each you got, you are like that 4th gender that does it all!

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