Some Days are More Surreal than Others

I haven’t been writing about it much because I keep hoping it will go away if I don’t talk about it but Ian has some sort of virus. He hasn’t been to school all week (you know, all two days that are involved in a two year olds school week) and Claudia only went to preschool on Tuesday because I had to co-op in their class that day.

Somehow Claudia has avoided coming down with whatever snot monster disease her brother has contracted. (Where is some wood to knock on?) I think all this being cooped up is making her sort of stir crazy (see my post from earlier today).

Fair Warning: Barf Talk Ahead

Ian doesn’t know how to blow his nose yet. Gabe and I have really been trying to teach him how and would love any suggestions you have on the subject, but in the meantime congestion means throwing up a lot. I am also working on getting him to puke in the toilet instead of all over the carpet like he normally does. This involves me saying things I never thought I would say like “Good job, throwing up in the toilet. I am very proud of you.” and “You can spit into the potty anytime you need to.” (I know I’ll regret that last one later.)

As a bonus, Gabe and I are also sick, which is awesome because we are going out for a very fancy dinner to celebrate my birthday tomorrow night. This isn’t the kind of restaurant where you can just change your reservation casually.

So earlier I was throwing up and Claudia stood in the bathroom doorway saying things like “Wow Mommy! That was a really big one!”

Fantastic. They don’t tell you about things like that in any of the parenting books I have read. I was actually barfing and replying “Yeah, It was a big one. Thanks, Honey.”

Oh, and Claudia keeps asking me to read her the calendar. No. You heard it right. She wants me to read her the calendar that came with the “Highlights Magazine” today, that I assume someone gave the twins a subscription to for Christmas. She refuses to believe that it isn’t a book.
Like I said, some days are more surreal than others.

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  1. Feel Better Goon Squad Family!

  2. Feel Better…Puking is just not fun.

  3. Ugh, I’m sorry. Think you can teach Claudia how to hold your hair back while you puke? It’s a good skill. . .

  4. I hope the frowing up stops very soon. Get the little stinker checked if you’re worried. Mother’s instinct, and all…feel better!

  5. Wow. Sorry to hear about all the vomit. Hopefully things will be cleared out before the big date Friday night.

    This is my first time to your site. I really like it. You’ll hear from me again.

  6. Oh, I hope you feel much much better so that you can enjoy your birthday!

  7. Mimi’s got the pukiness too. I’m hoping none of the rest of us get it so we don’t have to cancel our big hockey date.

    I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed for your dinner tomorrow night!

  8. Hey, we just started getting that magazine too. I figured it was from one of the grandparents. But maybe not?

    Get better quick! I was sick on my birthday last year with everyone else in the house. Hoping for NOT sick this year. (Knocking wood now.)

  9. Actually, a lot of kids are not physically capable of blowing their noses until like 6 or 7 or something. I remember looking it up when we couldn’t seem to teach Jack how to blow his nose. So it’s not you guys.

    Feel better.

  10. I know it’s cruel but I couldn’t stop laughing. Whatever you do, don’t tell non-parents about what’s going on. They would never understand and instead have your committed to nearest hospital.

    Haven’t you learned the most important lesson if you have children? ONLY hardwood floors in the whole house. That makes it easy to clean up barf, pee, poop, snot, and spilled food :-)

    Nice weekend


  11. hey sarah, zoe is sick too and missed 3 days of school this week. i hate to tell you but she does know how to blow her nose and yet every time she gets a cold or virus she throws up the mucus every day. it must be genetic!
    love b

  12. Oh can I relate to this one. I sprinkle my day with such phrases as…

    me: “Is it a peanut butter or marble poop?” ( my daughter battles frequent constipation)

    Paige: “Mommy I drink my juicy to help my poop, so you no stick somethin in my bum.” (yup, that’s right, at 2 she’s familiar with an enema and what it’s for)

    Paige: “You have potatoes in you nose? Pfffffff (blowing out her mouth) blow!”

  13. I think you have the key to parenting down just fine… Make everything a game. Puking, potty training, blowing the nose, you name it. 😉

  14. I used to sit for the toddler of a ped. She was irritatingly perfect. Drove me nuts. Anyhow, she taught me the trick to getting your baby to blow their nose. When they’re well (and this is totally gross), have them practice blowing out a candle with their nose.

    Be prepared. I can tell you from experience that even a well child will produce nasty nose juice when attempting this.

    Good luck!

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