I Come By this Sense of Humor Honestly

The Goon Squad’s grandparents help pay for their preschool. Each set of grandparents provides a “scholarship” for one child.

Yes, I know we are lucky, but that isn’t why I am telling you this. I am telling you about the scholarships so that I can get to this part of the story.

I got a check in the mail today from my father.

In the memo line he wrote “hush money”.

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  1. Your Dad and my Dad – should be friends.

    A couple of years ago, my Dad called me at work and when asked “Who was calling” by the kid answering the phone, he replied (in an authoritative voice), “Tell her it’s the IRS.”

    That kid was white as a ghost when he whispered to me that the IRS was on the phone. I thought he was going to faint when I started laughing (I knew immediately who it was).

  2. oh, that’s hysterical.

    but I just bribed my children to behave in a waiting room while I went to the doctor. (They also had Aladdin on the TV, and it’s a Family Practice)

    I’m glad your family has a good sense of humor!

  3. That sounds like something my dad would do…minus the money.

  4. That sounds likes something my Dad would do as well.

  5. At our local grocery store there was a stockboy named David. My father’s name is also David. Whenever my father would hear a PA annoucement of “David, clean up on aisle 7” My dad would yell out, “I’m on my way!”

  6. My dad’s favorite phone trick is whenever he answers and it’s a wrong number, he tells the caller, “_____ doesn’t want to talk to you. Ever again.” Waits a second for a response, then hangs up. He thinks he’s really, really funny. (So do I.)

  7. Next time he should put drugs. That’s funny too. Sexual favors would be funny if it wasn’t your dad, that would jest make it creepy.

  8. I’m convinced the Memo section on checks is to *only* be used for things like that. “Hush money” “sexual favors” and “body removal services” are always good ones.

    Your dad rules:-)

  9. My stepmother once wrote “Screw You” in the memo section of a check she sent in to pay for a parking ticket. The judge summoned her to court to “explain her rage”.

  10. How funny! I never would have thought of that. Although I once wrote “highway robbery” in the memo when paying a medical bill that my insurance didn’t cover.

    Ian

  11. Wow he really doesn’t get preschool ehh? Maybe hush-ah money. but I’m sure the teachers would agree with me there ain’t enough hush to go around there.

  12. Your dad rocks.

    I always write stupid things in the memo part of checks..Like ‘Happy Bat Mitzvah’ to Cablevision…and ‘SO sorry for your loss’ to the medical collectors.

  13. dragon-mum says:

    I could have so much fun with this, my whole family are twisted like this. Only in Australia, our cheques don’t have memo lines on them. Hmmm I might have to talk to the bank about this oversight. I am in hysterics just imagining the fun my family would have with this idea.
    Yvonne

  14. brilliant!

  15. My mother would appreciate that. Back in the days of cute little headings printed on message pads and post-its, my mother had a pad that read “Suicide Note.” Yep. Twisted.

  16. I do that sometimes too, although I haven’t used “hush money”. I used to sign Willie Nelson on my checks too and I’ve never had one returned. That seems weird.

  17. I can’t believe I’ve never thought of writing things in the memo lines like that. I’ve got a few utility companies that I really wouldn’t mind messing with.

  18. That’s good stuff.

  19. my dad doesn’t believe in giving money to anyone, at any time, under any circumstances. ever.

    think your dad would start sending me checks? they don’t have to be big, you know 10 or 15 cents here and there? he sounds funny.

  20. That is awesome.

    Reminds me of a late birthday card my Dad sent me (why he forgets tthe first born? why?) and the card itself was a belated type and the cover read “sorry this is late. But you know what they say, ‘Bettter late…
    [inside]
    …than pregnant.”

    Janet/Wondermom –Hee.

  21. I have to tell you that I am crying now….My belly hurts from laughing so hard. I’ve never thought of doing that with the memo lines…maybe I can now…lol!!!

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