Archive for March, 2007

March 27, 2007 | Food
My rice cooker overcooked my rice.
Two nights in a row.
I feel – betrayed.
I mean, isn’t that why I bought the stupid rice cooker in the first place? So that I wouldn’t end up overcooking my rice?
Should I buy another one? Or will this one just disappoint me too?
Or do I just suck at using my rice cooker?
Posted by Goon Squad Sarah @
8:50 pm |

I was at Safeway the other day when I saw something that really disturbed me. I was so upset that I took some pictures with my cellphone.
Nope. You are seeing it correctly. This is a picture of two NASCAR Harlequin romance novels. (There were others but the pictures came out blurry).
This makes me feel like my head is going to explode. Is there a market for this? Who is reading these? Admit it right now if it is you. Me? I think I’d rather jab myself in the eye with a sharp stick than read one of these books in my free time.
I’m not sure I’d read one of these if you paid me.
Well of course if you paid me enough I would, I’m not an idiot. But I wouldn’t enjoy it. No sir, I wouldn’t like it one bit. My head hurts just thinking about what kind of Busch Light beer fest the marketing department was having when they came up with this gem. I wonder if they even sell these above the Mason Dixon line. I moved 1000 miles north and I still live somewhere where they sell NASCAR romance novels in my grocery store.
I am so worked up about these books that I am thinking of having a contest to see if any of you can find even stupider books, but I haven’t decided what kind of prize would be appropriate. Would you guys play along?
Posted by Goon Squad Sarah @
3:48 pm |

Wearing crocodiles? As a girdle? Really? (Sorry, that link is no longer available. Too bad, it was messed up.)
I’m really not even sure what else I could say about this.
Posted by Goon Squad Sarah @
4:20 pm |

Dear Food and Wine Magazine
,
My mom got Gabe a subscription to you for Christmas and now I can’t put you down.
I want you to know that I am not a magazine person. I am a book person, I am an internet person. I only read the paper online, but it’s not like that with you. You give me pictures and recipies and pairings… I never set out to be a food and wine snob, but you are making it so easy!
All I ask from you is that you find a way for wine to have less empty calories. Any chance of that happening? If not, I understand. I will take your pairing suggestions anyway.
The wine store near my house wanted me to thank you too. They are making a killing off of me.
Love,
Sarah
(Nobody asked me to say any of this or paid me to say this. I didn’t get anything for free – unless you count me usurping Gabe’s Christmas present as free. That being said, I will always accept free wine in the future if anybody wants to send me some. Seriously, anyone? Food and Wine? Wine Spectator? Mom? I am not proud.)
Posted by Goon Squad Sarah @
9:32 am |

The gentlemen over at Kissing Suzy Kolber were able to combine my hatred for The Family Circus and my love for obscene sports humor in one post! (This conversation between Mike Vick and Arthur Blank is pretty funny too.)
Wow. I thought my potty training experience was getting goofy. Check out this post from Sweet Juniper – I’m not kidding it includes an illustration of Jesus pooping.
I’ve converted from Bloglines to Google Reader. This is how I’ve been reading my blogs
lately. I’m still getting the hang of it, so you can imagine my surprise when I thought I was reading Dooce and I accidentally clicked on my feed for Drunk Athlete (shut up. What do you read?). Instead of Leta or Chuck I saw this picture and I was pretty confused for a minute.
We’re going to the circus today. Gabe’s parents and I are taking The Goon Squad on the Metro. Ian LOVES the train. These two have never seen clowns in real life before. This could be the best day they have ever had or a total nightmare. Wish us luck.
OH! I forgot to tell you. The day Claudia peed in the potty at school, Ian also peed in the potty. I love peer pressure. In a related story, who knows where I can find some Mickey Mouse underpants? He refuses the Spiderman pairs. (I don’t know why. He loves his Spiderman couch and fishing pole.)
Posted by Goon Squad Sarah @
9:02 am |