Hipster Parent or Huge Dork?

Hipster parent or humongous dork? It is all in the eye of the beholder.

As I was all set to clean my house (the universe still hasn’t come through with that cleaning service yet, but I haven’t given up) I loaded up my iPod with The Horrors and EL-P* and I realized – Oh my God. Am I a hipster parent?

Lets see… I’m not really very cool, but my kids did have Misfits onesies and I have a kind of hipster job. I don’t have trendy clothes and I’m still not entirely sure who Death Cab for Cutie is.

You guys don’t think I’m a hipster, do you? I mean, you don’t have to say I’m a dork. I really mean, please don’t call me a dork. I guess what I really mean is that when I first read about the whole “grup” thing, and when everyone else was talking about it I kind of assumed it didn’t apply to me. Do you think you are a hipster? Do you hate the word hipster? How many times do you think I can work the word hipster into a single paragraph?

I give up. I’m going to go make some chai tea.

I’m kidding. It was a joke. That stuff tastes like ass. Plus you guys know I only drink coffee, water, beer or wine.

*( I also put a bunch of Nirvana on there because cleaning to songs from college make me appreciate how big my house and then I don’t mind vacuuming the stairs so much.)

I’ll try to have the contest results by tomorrow. Some of you guys are really close. I may need to bring in a third party judge.

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  1. You can call me, 'Sir' says:

    If everything your family wears involves hemp, you’re a hipster. If you wear hemp and collect Star Trek action figures, you’re a hipster dork. If you wear hemp, dress your children up as Star Trek characters, and drive an SUV, you’re a hipster-dork-hypocrite-moron hybrid.

    You don’t strike me as any of the above.

  2. I wouldn’t say hipster or dork. But then again, I listened to NIN, Marilyn Manson and Maroon 5 all morning so maybe I’m not the best person to ask.

  3. Wait, so does driving an SUV make me a hypocrite, a moron or both?

  4. some of us are really close? I can only take this to mean you definitely did it to taunt me.

    Also, according to my kids dork and hipster are not mutually exclusive categories. Go figure.

  5. The hipster test: Yes or No
    Do you own any pedro the lion?
    Do you have black plasatic glasses?
    Have you ever owned a Che Guevara T-shirt?

    Scores: 1 yes- you’re a poser; 2 yesses- don’t h8, you’re borderline; 3 yesses- you’re emolicious. embrace it already.

  6. Having never been cool a day in my life I feel spectacularly unqualified to answer this.

  7. You are a VonMotorhead. Anything else does not really matter

  8. I have a black 1984 Trans Am that I never drive because I feel guilty. I think that puts me into the DorkyHipster category (qualified best by the words whispered behind my back “I think she is trying to hard….”)

    snort. you are funny….

  9. Is anyone really qualified to answer this?? I’d love to know where I fall too?? So, if you figure it out, will you let me know??

  10. You’re plain ubercool. Is that German or Ikea-ish?
    What did I win?

  11. I put laundry away to Nine Inch Nails the other day..does that make me cool???


  12. If EL-P stands for Emerson, Lake and Palmer, I must be a hipster too. If it doesn’t, then you’re cooler than the kids in college these days, ’cause search me if I know what else it could mean.

  13. I am totally a dork and proud of it! I did a simple search of “Are you a hipster on Google? ” I came up with this web site it is amusing: http://www.hipsterhandbook.com/ It is sort of an advertisement for a book – I haven’t read the book, so who know if it is any good or not, the web site is funny though!

  14. I’m pretty sure I’m not a hipster. I’m not willing to spend that much on my clothes…though I’d love to.

  15. I own the Hipster Handbook!! And I realized, upon reading it, that I’m not nearly as hip as I thought I was. But anyone who owns, and can play, a Hello Kitty electric guitar? SO not a dork.

  16. the word hipster reminds me of jockey underwear. the “hipster” style is supposed to be smaller and lower cut. i bought a pair for after i had isabella (when thong-wearing is impossible) and seriously, they look like those monstrous underwear that Gwyneth Paltrow sports in shallow hal. small and low-cut my ass…

    oh, yes, what was your question. are you hip? it think it depends on what kind of jeans you wear….i’m serious.

  17. Can you be a dorkster?

  18. man, I gotta take dork on this one

    that’s okay, right?

  19. Okay…I don’t wanna be a dork…maybe I’ll be an “un-hipster”…

  20. I’ve decided that I’m a dichotomy. I drive a minivan, but I love (a bit ashamedly) Panic! at the disco.

    A kid in the gym’s childcare area looked at me today and said “Do you have a lot of earrings?”. I realized I was wearing about 6 in one ear, and it made me feel better :)

  21. Sorry to say I have an answer for you … I was looking for images for an SD story and googled “parent dork.” Your site came up first. I’m not joking.

  22. I thought hipster was a style of underwear. Hmm…I am such a dork!

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