April 27, 2007
Did I ever tell you guys that I know someone who had sex with Carrot Top? Yes that Carrot
Top. True story. I found out about while playing a game of “I Never” in college. I laughed really, really hard. Right up until they found out something embarrassing about me. Not that embarrassing, but still…
My friend Michelle and her son say they like the Alanis Morissette version, but they like this kid singing “My Humps” better.
And Devra sent me this gem from You Tube. Potter Puppet Pals in “The Mysterious Ticking Noise“.
Some of us are throwing an online shower for Liz (Mom-101), Christina (A Mommy Story) and Tammie (Soul Gardening). Go play the games - there will be prizes!
Now I’m going to the beach.
Posted by Sarah @ 9:24 am • Randomness
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April 27th, 2007 at 9:35 am, Alison Says:
So, the hook-up was before or after he got all roided out?
April 27th, 2007 at 10:20 am, Lisa Says:
Eww!! Carrot Top!??! That’s just wrong on so many levels.
April 27th, 2007 at 11:00 am, Christina Says:
That might be one of the scariest pictures of Carrot Top ever.
Have you seen the Will Farrell short film of “The Landlord”? I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard at a toddler swearing in my life.
And yes, go play games, people! At least they’re not making you eat and guess the baby food!
April 27th, 2007 at 11:29 am, Nicole Says:
I personally wouldnt go there.
April 27th, 2007 at 1:13 pm, Janet a.k.a Wonder Mom Says:
You are full of those little gems aren’t you…Loved it.
Carrot Top? I’d do him.
April 27th, 2007 at 1:47 pm, Tink Says:
LOVED those videos. Especially the little kid one. Too cute for words.
April 27th, 2007 at 3:08 pm, Senja Says:
OT,
I am a mere worm in your vast domain, but I read you religiously. Every cult needs a leader. I wanted to let you know you can sport a “Thinking Blogger” award as I have nominated you. Find room amongst your statues and bowling trophys.
Senja with Search and Destroy
April 27th, 2007 at 3:37 pm, Karen Says:
It was Erin, wasn`t it? I know it was Erin. Had to be.
Or AARON??
Oh and Janet? That is totally sick. As in sick, not as in cool like all the kids are saying. Werd.
April 27th, 2007 at 3:40 pm, QofS Says:
I DID NOT HUMP CARROT TOP.
Aaron might have, but I did not.
April 27th, 2007 at 3:41 pm, Karen Says:
I knew it was Aaron all along. That boy is a supa-freak.
April 27th, 2007 at 3:42 pm, QofS Says:
Maybe it was Aaron, Gabe, and Carrot Top after a night of drinking.
April 27th, 2007 at 3:43 pm, Karen Says:
I would think so. And hot pink buttplugs.
April 27th, 2007 at 3:44 pm, QofS Says:
Actually, maybe I do know this story…Gabe and Aaron were at this corner bar in Orlando…
April 27th, 2007 at 3:44 pm, QofS Says:
…and Aaron, of course was a door to door buttplug salesman at the time
April 27th, 2007 at 3:45 pm, Karen Says:
….and they ‘accidently’ walked into a gay bar…
April 27th, 2007 at 3:45 pm, QofS Says:
and Gabe said hey…isn’t that carrot top?
April 27th, 2007 at 3:46 pm, Karen Says:
…And Aaron said, `Radical! It totally is Carrot Top! Let`s go talk to him!`
April 27th, 2007 at 3:46 pm, QofS Says:
aaron still says radical
April 27th, 2007 at 3:48 pm, Karen Says:
I believe that.
So they go and talk to Carrot Top, and Aaron starts off by professing his true love for the red-headed freak. Gabe just stands there, coyly playing with his hair, waiting to speak to his idol….
April 27th, 2007 at 3:48 pm, QofS Says:
he also says butt plug a lot, but that’s a different story
April 27th, 2007 at 3:49 pm, Karen Says:
oh gross, Erin. Gah!
So Carrot Top is loving the attention, and says, `hey - you guys wanna hit my crib? I got hot pink butt plugs - like 8 sizes!’
April 27th, 2007 at 3:50 pm, Karen Says:
(Sarah is currently re-thinking her decision to room with me at BlogHer…Sarah…I`ve never even SEEN a buttplug - don`t worry)
April 27th, 2007 at 3:50 pm, QofS Says:
Yeah…but Gabe was sooo whipped at the time, he had to call Sarah first. Who, of course, didn’t believe him. So Aaron got on the phone to tell her “no, really…we’re going to go get it up the butt from that freaky red-haired guy!”
April 27th, 2007 at 3:51 pm, Karen Says:
Carrot Top was all `why do you have to check in with your mother Gabe?
Aaron grabbed CT`s ass and they left the bar…
April 27th, 2007 at 3:53 pm, QofS Says:
Oh! And then they get to CT’s pad and it’s all like, billboards and cut out of Carrot Top NAKED and everywhere. Not to mention the clown costumes…I mean, we all know he gets off on the clown costumes.
So anyway, Aaron and Gabe put on the red noses and make their move
April 27th, 2007 at 3:55 pm, Karen Says:
…Gabe crawls across the orange shag carpet (what else?) on his knees and smiles at Aaron, who is lounging on the big sofa that is the shape of Ronald McDonald`s shoe….
April 27th, 2007 at 3:56 pm, QofS Says:
That Gabe gets on his knees a lot. He likes that whole…I’m a tiger! No, I’m a huntress! No, I’m a crazy gay clown coming to do dirty things to you! Thing…
April 27th, 2007 at 3:57 pm, Karen Says:
…Carrot Top walks into the room, carrying two large Grape Bubble Teas for his new boys. He licks his lips at the sight of Gabe all tiger-like on the shag…than looks over at his hairy new friend Aaron….it`s like a regular jungle in here…
April 27th, 2007 at 4:01 pm, QofS Says:
That CT was soooo sly. He had this remote control that dimmed the lights as his sound system began to play some mood music…”Hey, hey, it’s JoJo’s Circus / JoJo, JoJo’s Circus / Hey, everyone, it’s time for JoJo’s Circus / (JoJo, JoJo’s Circus) / Get on your feet, we’re gonna have some some fun / (”Come on, everybody!”) / Come on, do it with us / Hooray, hooray, we’re going to JoJo’s Circus / (JoJo, JoJo’s Circus) / We’ll jump and play, there’s fun for every (”Whoa!”) one / (Hey, hey!) / Come on, clap your hands now / (JoJo!) / Come on, jump up high / (Circus!) / Come on, do it with us / (JoJo!) / We’re gonna reach the sky / (Hey, hey!) / Come on, sing along now / (Hey!) / Come on, it’s time for JoJo’s Circus / Hey!”
April 27th, 2007 at 4:02 pm, Karen Says:
So Gabe and Aaron are totally digging that whole JoJo`s Circus thing and start dancing a là Pee Wee`s Playhouse….
April 27th, 2007 at 4:03 pm, QofS Says:
…and of course CT KNOWS PeeWee…so he calls him over to join the gay clown orgy.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:05 pm, Karen Says:
Next thing you know…everyone has their clothes off and there are balloons everywhere…and we all know how much Gabe and Aaron like latex balloons….they start rubbing them…
…into Aaron`s shaggy hair and sticking them to the walls….
..then, Michael Jackson shows up with lollipops and rainbows!
April 27th, 2007 at 4:06 pm, QofS Says:
…and you KNOW when Michael shows up the monkeys get involved. Which is where Aaron FINALLY drew the line. Gabe was all for it…but Aaron was like…uh uh, no way.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:07 pm, Karen Says:
Well that is only because he feels so akin to the monkeys. They are family. That would be like incest.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:08 pm, QofS Says:
Right. Right. And that whole “bannana” incident back in ‘89.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:09 pm, Karen Says:
With Gwen Stefani? So THAT`s where that song came from - That shit is Bananas..B A N A N A S!
April 27th, 2007 at 4:10 pm, QofS Says:
Well, it was Gwen’s grandma actually. She only recently passed away so let’s not speak of that.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:11 pm, Karen Says:
Oh I had no idea Aaron was into the geriatric community. He always seemed so hip. I wasn`t aware he was into those who were more prone to breaking their hips.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:12 pm, QofS Says:
She was much younger back then, it was more a Mrs. Robinson thing. But anyway…Gabe and Aaron start to girl fight over who gets CT and who gets a monkey. Michael just wants to watch and PeeWee has already passed out-you know, what with all the cream pies in the face.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:14 pm, Karen Says:
Those weren`t cream pies Erin - remember, Michael brought them from Neverland. Gizz pie.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:15 pm, QofS Says:
I’m so nieve sometimes.
But yeah…so Gabe says there is NOW WAY he’s going for the monkey and Aaron says there is No WAY he’s going for the monkey, so Carrot Top decides they have to have a battle to see who gets him.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:16 pm, Karen Says:
So they have the naked breakdancing contest and Michael is the judge…
April 27th, 2007 at 4:17 pm, QofS Says:
Now I have seen both of these guys naked break dance before..but let me tell you, they pulled out ALL the STOPs because Michael was there. I mean, Aaron even tried the PENIS spin.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:18 pm, Karen Says:
…and that is how he broke his dick.
So Gabe wins and Aaron has to have hot monkey sex. With a broken dick.
Carrot Top is thrilled that Gabe won because that means HE gets him…
April 27th, 2007 at 4:19 pm, QofS Says:
…and poor Aaron had to wear that little bandage and crutch for WEEKS after that attempt. AND got that disease from the monkey.
But Gabe. Yeah…Gabe still talks about how he slept with Carrot Top.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:29 pm, Karen Says:
So Sarah, what WAS the embarrassing thing that game revealed about YOU?
Let’s see…
…secret obsession with men’s jocks?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:30 pm, QofS Says:
Pooped her pants at a Slayer concert?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:32 pm, Karen Says:
Threw up on Gabe’s knob?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:34 pm, QofS Says:
Farted..but not the butt one?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:34 pm, Karen Says:
You mean a Queef, Queen?
*snort*
I can see that.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:35 pm, QofS Says:
Oh wait! I know! She also slept with a semi-famous comedian…guess who?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:36 pm, Karen Says:
Pauly Shore?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:37 pm, QofS Says:
DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE, as if.
CARLOS MENCIA ??? We all know she secretly loves him.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:38 pm, Karen Says:
EW!
I would believe Bobcat Golthwaite over Mencia. Mencia is a theif.
As if.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:39 pm, QofS Says:
Whoopy Goldberg?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:40 pm, Karen Says:
Yeah I can see that. Sarah’s hands gripped on those dreads….
Oh Whoopi!
April 27th, 2007 at 4:42 pm, QofS Says:
Maybe she just fell down some stairs or something. Oh, wait…maybe she fell down the stairs and grabbed on to whoopi’s dreads as she was going down…
April 27th, 2007 at 4:43 pm, Karen Says:
Wait. Is Rosie O’Donnell considered a comedian?
And when did this switch from guys to girls?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:44 pm, QofS Says:
Yes, Rosie is and was a comedian.
And it IS Sarah…I mean, we all know Gabe used to be a girl…it’s common knowledge.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:47 pm, Karen Says:
Holdup.
Holdup.
Holdup.
I can’t believe that for one second.
Rosie IS considered a comedian?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:48 pm, QofS Says:
Totally. Much like John Tesh is considered a musician and we consider my 2 year old an artist. Same thing.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:49 pm, Karen Says:
Why do you keep bringing up the fact that Gabe was a girl? It’s because he is still prettier than you, right?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:50 pm, QofS Says:
Sigh.
Yes. He’s much prettier than me. I hate him. The bitch.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:50 pm, Karen Says:
Thick ankles.
So, who do you think will kill us the most for this blog hijack? Sarah, Aaron, or the pretty boy?
April 27th, 2007 at 4:52 pm, QofS Says:
the pretty boy. he’s soooooo sensitive. plus we pinned the who “sleeping with carrot top” thing on him.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:53 pm, Karen Says:
Yeah. We’re dead meat. Maybe I should hack into the blog and delete all these comments……
……nah.
Fuck it.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:54 pm, QofS Says:
Plus, if we’re going to hack into this blog…there is no way we’d stop at just the comments.
April 27th, 2007 at 4:55 pm, Karen Says:
Yeah - I’d have to design a new header or something…
April 27th, 2007 at 5:08 pm, Karen Says:
Ha ha ha….HIT REFRESH PEOPLE! If you don’t see Carrot Top in the header, clear your cache.
We’re in SO much trouble when Sarah gets back!
April 27th, 2007 at 5:10 pm, QofS Says:
OMG
I hope Carrot Top finds this too.
April 27th, 2007 at 5:55 pm, tori Says:
Oh. MY. God. You guys are the funniest! I really needed a laugh after much poop collecting today (read my blog if you don’t know what I am talking about!) Thank you! Seriously!
April 27th, 2007 at 6:24 pm, the kaiser Says:
So anyway the point of all this is… does anyone want to buy a buttplug?
April 27th, 2007 at 6:24 pm, QofS Says:
AND to make sure everyone knows it was Gabe who slept with Carrot Top.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:01 pm, Paula The Surf Mom Says:
OMG…. what a difference a day makes… Carrot top…
Hey you coming to MY beach?
April 27th, 2007 at 8:25 pm, Yuri Says:
Dying, just dying over here! The new header is *crazy* funny. I’ve been meaning to tell you also, your header (w/o CT) is the best one I’ve ever seen before in my life, hands down. My boys love watching the mom get her head blown off. HAHA.
April 27th, 2007 at 10:09 pm, April Says:
One, what are you two on? Two, can I get some? I’ve dealt with a sick kid all week, now the princess in feverish, and I need a break…I almost fell off of my chair at the broken penis…lol.
Karen, I love the new header..It’s great!!!
April 27th, 2007 at 11:03 pm, Lori Says:
So, um, Sarah? You claim these people as friends? REALLY? I’m just checking because, I SO would. I don’t think I’ve laughed this hard in a very very very long time! Oh, and the new header! Classic! Just Classic! I’m almost willing to pay alot of money to see your face when you see this for the first time.
April 27th, 2007 at 11:18 pm, QofS Says:
We can probably figure out a way to charge for that. How much money are we talking here?
April 27th, 2007 at 11:34 pm, Karen Says:
ONE.
MILLION.
DOLLARS.
Pony up, Lori.
Kaiser: I’ll take 6. XXXL please.
April 27th, 2007 at 11:43 pm, Lori Says:
Ladies, ladies, ladies………I said, ALMOST!
April 28th, 2007 at 9:15 am, Chag Says:
Sarah– never pass out drunk with those two. You’ll be covered heat-to-toe in Sharpie and God knows what else.
April 28th, 2007 at 11:47 am, Karen Says:
Erin and I, or Kaiser and Gabe?
I vote both!
Bwaaaahahahahaha!
April 28th, 2007 at 11:47 am, Karen Says:
Oh Lori - you’re such a tease.
April 28th, 2007 at 8:12 pm, Devra Says:
I’m sure Sarah will tell us which of the three listed below really slept with Carrot Top.
Larry Birkhead
Howard K. Stern
Prince Frederick von Anhalt
April 28th, 2007 at 11:22 pm, Lori Says:
Well, Karen, I am that type of girl!
Sarah will probably tell you that I’m terribly cheap too.
It’s a sickness, I know, I’m sorry.
April 29th, 2007 at 9:06 am, Yoli Says:
I have just come across your blog. Total genious! Love it!!!
April 29th, 2007 at 9:48 am, April Says:
So, has she seen this yet??? And if so, why no reaction??
April 29th, 2007 at 10:09 am, Gidge Says:
Omg I love you guys.
And I do believe Kaiser says both radical AND Butt plugs, and probably in the same sentence.
Good Times.
April 29th, 2007 at 2:18 pm, Karen Says:
Erin informed me that Sarah, The Goon Squad and Carrot Top’s ex-boyfriend are at the beach this weekend….I can’t WAIT for her reaction though!
April 29th, 2007 at 4:04 pm, Victoria Says:
OMG!!! This is the most hilarious sequence of comments Ive read in a while & that’s without knowing many of those involved! lol!
April 29th, 2007 at 4:30 pm, Alison Says:
If there was a blogger’s choice award for best blog-jack, you two would be the shoe-in!
April 29th, 2007 at 6:21 pm, Karen Says:
Alison, why does that sound sexual to me?
April 29th, 2007 at 9:39 pm, Vampdaddy Says:
This is my first visit to your blog, but certainly not my last…Carrot Top? That’s really something special!
April 29th, 2007 at 10:01 pm, Jenn Says:
Suddenly, I am very, very afraid of BlogHer. Must. Run. Now.
April 29th, 2007 at 11:08 pm, Kara Says:
Suddenly feeling jealous that my friends never hijack my blog like this. Um, hey, I’ve always wanted a kitten named by a travelling butt plug salesman and his perverted freak monkeyfucking posse. Come over and help me, mkay?
Hey, and um, when you were hijacking the blog did you break in and install a nannycam? Because I would give almost anything to see the look on her face. Hey- what’s Beth doing now, she lives nearby, she admits to being flexible, and I bet Chris coulf figure how to break in and sneak out undetected. Just sayin’.
April 29th, 2007 at 11:18 pm, CroutonBoy Says:
jesus
h
christ
ladies, remind me NEVER to get on your bad side, especially when you have that much time on your hands. And when CT finds out he’s SOOOO coming to your place with a giant plastic telephone and kicking your asses.
April 30th, 2007 at 7:33 am, Karen Says:
Jenn - you should be.
Kara - be careful what you wish for.
Crouton Boy - You’re the only other person I’ve EVER heard say Jesus H. Christ and now you are my new blog crush.
Also, where in the Sam Hell is Sarah? We want pictures of your face while you’re reading this!
April 30th, 2007 at 10:11 am, Dana Says:
I think I just peed my pants.
Queenie, Doug wants to know if the Kaiser has any glow-in-the-dark butt plugs.
Karen, I am now worried about you hacking into blogs and changing headers. What’s worse is I didn’t even notice it until y’all pointed it out!
Sarah, darling, don’t hurt them, they were smoking some of my left over jane.
April 30th, 2007 at 10:36 am, Stacy Says:
This is the funniest thing I’ve read in a VERY long time. Gotta say I’m loving CT on the banner, too.
You guys are hilarious…
April 30th, 2007 at 4:45 pm, Violet the Verbose Says:
Oh geez, that was so wrong. I read this whole thing, chortling all the while, and afterward went to check my e-mail. What’s in the inbox? A forward from my dad entitled, “how to take a cork out of a bottle.” I think I’m gonna hurl.
April 30th, 2007 at 7:32 pm, Mom101 Says:
I fear that my thank you here is interrupting the lovely comment flow that’s been established. Still, I’d hate to be accused of a rude showereee, so I’ll just interrupt to say thanks…now carry on, Erin and Karen.
January 12th, 2008 at 1:43 am, Karen Sugarpants Says:
This is still my favorite blog hijack ever. I should do this more often.