I Don’t Think this Counts as T.M.I.

If I am telling you too much, I apologize in advance. I just don’t know who else to tell when my gynecologist tell me that I have a perfect pelvis.

A perfect pelvis? I had no idea. I was very flattered.pelvis

Of course, she had to go and wreck everything by telling me that I had gained a lot of weight this year.

As if I hadn’t noticed.

I was all set to blame my medication, which can be responsible for that kind of thing. I was hoping she would feel sorry for me and give me some Phen Phen help suggest a diet supplement or something. But no, she told me to eat less and exercise more.

Then to add insult to injury, she said that when we get older sometimes it just gets harder to maintain a healthy weight.

First she says I’m fat and then she says I’m old… I won’t even go into what else she did to me. I left the office feeling pretty bad about myself.

But at least I have a nice pelvis. Whatever the hell that means.

(That picture is not my pelvis. I can only assume mine is better than this one.)

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  1. I was once told that I had a beautiful uterus. In fact I think you were there for that comment.

  2. What good is a perfect pelvis if there isn’t enough stuff surrounding it to protect it??? Leave that extra flesh just where it is…she’s just jealous.

  3. They do say, “It’s what’s on the INSIDE that counts.” Duh. 😉

  4. Wow. That’s an awesome shoulder blade you’re sporting, too. (The left one, of course. The right one is just average.)

  5. I’d settle for a perfect anything but oreferably something that showed

  6. Wide hips… go for baby

  7. On the day you can only buy your clothes at Lane Bryant, we’ll talk about you being fat.
    You R-Tard.

  8. But good on you for going to the doctor at all.

    Metabolism. Shit. I bet you are hot though!

  9. I keep trying to find a way to lose weight that doesn’t involve exercise, but so far no luck!

    I think you should design a “perfect pelvis” blog button.

  10. Am I the only one having problems posting comments???

  11. I once had a guy that I was informally dating (translate: friends with benefits) tell me that I had great child-bearing hips… I’d have felt a lot better had that comment come from my OB/GYN… 😉 At least they are “trained” to think about and observe your pelvic region…

    At least it’s “perfect” instead of “kittywhompus” or some equally disturbing phrase that you wouldn’t want to hear.

  12. You don’t know who else to tell? Good Lord, woman, get thee to a bumper sticker maker, slap them words on your car. “Perfectly Pretty Pelvis on Board.”

  13. she deserves a good ole’ kick. you are one smokin’ hot mama.

  14. Hehe. Purdy pelvis.

  15. Your Mother says:

    Sarah, I am just so very proud of you and your perfect pelvis! Love, MAMA

  16. I had something really witty and dirty to say…and then I saw sarah’s mom posted above me. And now I am afraid to say anything but…I LOVE YOU TOO!

  17. I do agree that would make for a great blog award. Or the perfect comment to the snotty cheerleader you see at your 10 year high school reunion.

  18. When the gyne said you have a ‘perfect pelvis’ was he looking at your Xray? I.e. or was he looking down there?

  19. Now I have something to shoot for when I go to my yearly appointment in a few weeks. Thanks for the goal!

  20. Well that certainly something. You ought to get the Pelvis Presley award or something. He seemed to be into swiveling hips and all that.

  21. Glad it’s not just your doctor. My doctor, at my second (?) pap smear after my son, told me that I had the cervix of a sixteen-year-old. I looked him square in the eyes and said, “I have no response to that.” He cracked up.

    And my midwife told me that you could drive a truck through my pelvis. I was a size 4 at the time, so I didn’t let it hurt my feelings. (But after 2 c-sections I felt a little grumpy that not even a baby, much less a truck, had fit through it.)

  22. “Nice pelvis?” I think it’s about time for a background check.

    BROWNSVILLE, Texas (AP) – December 20, 2006 – Two men passed themselves off as doctors and performed pelvic, breast and other exams on female patients, according to an indictment.

    Arthur Daniel Hayes, 56, was arrested Tuesday and was being held in lieu of $200,000 bail. The second man, whose name was not immediately released, had not been arrested by late Tuesday.

    They are charged with practicing without a license, sexual assault and Medicaid fraud.

    “They set up with what looked like a doctor’s office. They wore doctors’ coats. They presented themselves as doctors,” Chuck E. Mattingly Jr., chief first assistant district attorney, told The Brownsville Herald.

  23. When I was in college, I had an incident where I had to go to my gynecologist. (Okay, I confess. My tampon string broke and I couldn’t get the damn thing out. I know it’s gross. I’m sorry.)

    He told me, as I’m lying on the table, vulnerable, “You’ve got the perfect childbearing hips.”

    I started to cry. It was mortifying.

  24. We must have the same doctor because mine told me I was basically fat and old last visit too!

    Of course, I’ve never heard the words “perfect pelvis” though so I’m very jealous!

  25. I also had a gynecologist tell me I had excellent “child bearing hips”, which is interesting since I had to have 3 c-sections!

    Also, I saw my doctor Wednesday, and she told me to go on a 1200 calorie a day diet, because women “my age” just don’t need very many calories a day. And then I punched her in the neck.

    Okay, no I didn’t, but I wanted to.

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