Mommy, are you okay?
Yeah, I’m just a little sad.
Why are you sad Mommy?
Well, you know my Uncle Howie? He died, and I’m just a little bit sad.
He had a heart attack?
Where did he go?
What do you mean?
Where is he now?
Well, he’s in New Jersey.
Have you ever tried to talk to a three year old about death? I mean, I hope you have never had to, but if it comes up, apparently you can avoid the whole discussion on the afterlife by telling the child the deceased is in New Jersey, which in this particular case happens to be true.
So, I’m in New Jersey right now. Gabe and the kids stayed home. I just think that my kids aren’t ready for a funeral situation. I think it would be different if this were someone that my children were close to, but they didn’t know my uncle very well and I think it would be very stressful for them.
I think they have already picked up on my mood. As a parent I really try to keep all of my personal stresses in check. I try not to let that stuff effect the kids, but it doesn’t always work.
And then there was this parenting gem from yesterday afternoon: I took the kids outside to play and wait for their Dad to come home from work. The love to be out there when Gabe comes home so that they can run up to his car and yell “SURPRISE!”
Not that he can’t see them when he drives up to the house.
Anyway, the Goon Squad knows that they have to stay in the grass, driveway, or on the sidewalk when we are in the front yard, and yesterday Ian was standing at the very bottom of the driveway and putting one foot in the street.
And staring me right in the eye.
Ian. Do not put your foot in the street.
He does it again.
Boy. Get your foot out of the street.
He puts his left foot back on the driveway, shifts his weight, puts his right foot into the road and smirks at me.
Ian. You know you are not allowed to be in the street unless you are holding the hand of an adult.
I see him getting ready to do it yet again.
IAN! if you put your foot in the street one more time I am going to go inside, get Buzz Lightyear and take him to New Jersey with me!
While I admit that I lost my temper and probably handled the situation poorly, I really meant that I was going to bring Buzz Lightyear with me so that he couldn’t play with him for two days. He loves that stupid Buzz Lightyear doll.
What I didn’t take into consideration until about an hour and a half later is that because of our earlier conversation (and also probably things they have head on The Simpsons or Futurama) my kids are going to end up being scared of the entire state of New Jersey if I am not more careful.