Traffic Experiment #2 – Contest Update #2

I just wanted to let you know how Traffic Experiment #2 is going.

Now that I unbolded (Shut up. It could be a word. You don’t know.) your search term suggestions things are finally working.

Our current leaders are Ali with Homer Simpson vagina tattoo and Tammy with forcing your husband to wear panties.

I was so fascinated by Ali’s search term about the vagina tattoo that I did some research. You people are NEVER going to believe this: do not click this link at work. (I should have known that Susie Bright would come through for me.)

I’ll give you another update sometime next week. The kids and I are also going to draw a winner for our other contest this afternoon. (There is still time to enter to win).

In the meantime Ian and I will be at the ENT trying to figure out why he drools so much.

(For a recap of all of the terms in the contest click more – if you’ve already seen them, don’t click more.)

Arwen: Chocolate Chip Cookies that make you fart, poot, toot or pass gas.

Kellyology : asshole bleaching or bleaching your asshole and 4-year-old soccer.

Michele gives us: Under my skirt, fat naked chick and “at pregnant naked chick.

Chase : vagina taste, girls tasting ass and taste of female piss…. tig ol bitties and double d boobs.

Luther: Can you get high from smoking a hemp skirt?

Tastes Like Crazy : boobs.

ktjrdn : duct tape prom dress and AOL is a virus

Emily: reindeer poop.

Papa Bradstein: Ahmadinjead Uses iPhone to Take Picture of Britney’s Boobs, Bleached Ass and Sends Taste to Lindsay Lohan, Plus Posts on MySpace.

Whit: Pregnant Miley Cyrus and Nude Vanessa Hudgens in sex tape scandal with gay Zac Efron and Kim Possible.

Floreksa : Removing Vongo

Ree: Do grasshopper legs taste like chicken?

De in D.C.: edible underwear panties red.

You can call me Sir: is my ass haunted by pirates?

Elizabeth : baby names that end in y .

Paula the Surf Mom : outing Marsha and Jan Brady as lesbians

Tammy says: forces son/husband to wear panties/dresses.

Jill: catapult pumpkins or catapult midgets or is Sara Sidle dead. homemade dildo ?

Kate : poop on boobs and snuggle boobs feast

Patois: Bush visits Britney’s breastfeeding pictures in Facebook.

NG : was mr rogers in prison and sharp shooting crotch pain

The Other Bear : aunty’s breast milk

Suburban Oblivian: Oblivion boobs or oblivion hooker

XDM: Pregnant Pounders

Devra: panties and what does schmuck mean, naked barbie or panties image search.

Geena from Perpetual Exhaustion : mommy tampon aunt flo

Busy Mom: Anything with the Wiggles

Karen: boy enemas.

Sassymonkey: edible underwear.

Samantha Jo from Back to Me : Getting spanked by a semi

Velocibadgergirl from Pardon the Egg Salad :Kat von D’s boobs.

Suebob : peeing pants stories. Scarlet Johanson tits

Fear and Loathing in Stepford: I saw my first penis, camels eating generic viagra with their toes in bed with the olsen twins and lindsay lohan and paris hilton and rush limbaugh and a few tranny hookers… and mitt romney.

Phoenix: Nature’s Porn.

Trish : Huge lactating nipples. How to deal with my idiot ex-husband.

Redneck Mommy: redneck, mommy’s boobs and duct tape.

Sunshine (…and the pursuit of happiness): Double D’s and Ginormous boobies

Casey : lesbian cucumber sandwich.

Gidge: gorrilla bakes poop cookies. Gorilla poops no bake cookies.

Helena from Thrice Blessed Momma: in the gyno stirrups

The Queen of Shake Shake :Mike Rowe naked, crack whore videos, skid mark panties and Queen of Farts.

Ali from Cheaper Than Therapy: Homer Simpson vagina tattoo.

ps – Here are a few of my own: Ann Coulter and jews, The Office Pam no shirt, butt nugget, DJ Lance Rock, fart blossom, Project Runway Season 4.

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  1. Wow, it’s strangely hypnotic… mixed with disturbing and funny. Wonder where she has the Bart tat?

  2. Because he’s a genius who thinks really hard all the time (see: previous post). Duh.

    But seriously? Good luck.

    And that Homer thing is F-ED up.

  3. I will never look at Homer the same way again.

  4. I’m really hoping that isn’t a tattoo. I’m hoping its just drawn on w/Crayola because, you know, OUCH!

  5. Good luck at the ENT, my son went about threem onths ago and the doctor stated he wanted to remove both his tonsils and adnoids. So we scheduled surgery for the first of the year. Maybe now the drooling and the OLD MAN snoring will subside.

  6. Good luck at the ENT. My 2 year old son went three months ago to an ENT and the doctor recommended that his adnoids and tonsils be removed. His tonsils are HUGE. So we scheduled surgery for the first of the year. Hopefully now the drooling and the SNORING like an old man will subside.

  7. My Name is Earl featured a vagina tattoo just last night. Go figure.

  8. i told you it was a good one… :)

  9. I’m slightly repulsed, and yet in awe that someone even has that kind of creativity.

    Also? Ouch.

  10. I think I found my next Windows background image.

  11. There are no words in my head to describe that tattoo. Just… nothing.

  12. Ian’s drooling could be allergies – http://mommyspeechtherapy.com/?p=57 has ideas to help stop the drooling (or at least lessen it).

  13. I’m extremely curious as to whether it’s actually a real tattoo… or just makeup. Hmmm.

  14. I’m so going to think of this every time someone mentions the Simpsons now. And do you know how often a Simpons reference comes up in my work meetings? Almost weekly. (I work with a lot of guys). Lovely.

    And for the record…I’ve seen photos of a guy who tattooed his penis to look like the devil. So that could totally be a real tattoo. Just sayin’.

  15. My eyes! My eyes!

  16. Errr, I think some of my google searches are on here. JK!

    There are some sick, sick Google pervs out there.

    The one about the ass being haunted by pirates…I almost died. What crazy person googles that?

  17. OK, those search terms are all funny and scary.

  18. Today I checked my stats and my current favorite search term linking to my blog is, “food allergies fever pee butt”. Sucks to be them for sure.

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