Search Terms of The Week

Hey, let’s stop talking about how sick I am. Let us instead talk about the whack job searches that have brought people to my little site:

Search Term That Freaked Me the F Out:

my pet snake isn’t eating and sleeping beside me

Is anyone else getting hundreds of hits a month by people searching “computers internet blog”?

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Do you think the person looking for “coke and dayquil mix” had coca-cola in mind or cocaine? Either way it makes me jittery just thinking about it.

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The Hell?

buttcrack recipe

big girls has a wet poopy diapers with pictures

olsen twins in duct tape and skirt

Dayquil makes you smell

drinking games vegetable thins

do cats hibernate?

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And really, I get this one a lot, but I honestly cannot find the answer so what are the 7 signs of the apocalypse? Do you guys know?

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  1. Note: You never said “Tell me the 7 signs and explain WTF they mean” *grin*

    1- The many “false prophets” that will deceive many, The False Prophets are also mentioned during the Great Tribulation.

    2- “Wars and rumors of wars”

    3- “Famines”

    4- “Earthquakes”

    5- “Persecutions and tortures to the elect”, The elect are the supposed true followers.

    6- Lawlessness . . . “The love of many will grow cold”

    7- “This good news of the kingdom will be proclaimed to the whole world

  2. I’m pretty sure one of the seven signs of the apocalypse is cats hibernating.

    (And Dayquil DOES make you smell. Like blessed blessed productivity. Can you tell I’ve been relying on it for a few days?)

  3. I’m deeply embarrassed to admit this but I found the list on Yahoo! Answers. Some 12 year old probably knew while I was searching Google feverishly with my big-adult-brain to no avail…until I found that magical 12 year old with her (source-less) list.

    In researching further (I felt a twinge of guilt at not giving explanations…I’m a freak like that) all I found was more confusion and more from Yahoo! http://ask.yahoo.com/20040309.html

  4. Buttcrack recipe? Awesome. Scary, but awesome.

  5. Buttcrack recipe is awesome. I’ve gotten a hit from, “I wanna see my teacher’s boobs.” But I think buttcrack recipe is way cooler.

  6. Buttcrack recipe? That’s interesting.

  7. Sarah, I love your search terms features! Right now, I’ve surrendered to American Idol in a blog traffic experiment and all the search terms that I find have something to do with AI. Did you know that Buttcrack is a drink? (of course I had to Google it too!) 1.0 oz Red Rum & 1.0 oz Absolut Citron Vodka
    Directions: Pour Red Rum and Absolut Citron into a double shooter………… Really good to give to those you don’t like…..
    What have you been drinking, Miss Sarah?

  8. The internet is a weird, weird place!

  9. I’m just dying of laughter at the apocalypse bit. I think that’s found in the Bible. But I could be wrong….(and really, I’m not a bad Catholic.) 😉

  10. You can call me, 'Sir' says:

    All seven of the signs have been occurring regularly since before the bible was printed, distributed, and waved over the heads of fat evangelists, so I’m not sure how much credence to put into them anymore. I’d actually be worried about a buttcrack recipe than false prohets.

  11. My favorite search term from yesterday was “mumps pickles”.

  12. I only know the Seven Signs from the Demi Moore movie so, you know.
    Don’t feel bad about not being a biblical scholar.
    I’m getting my info from DEMI MOORE.

  13. Oh and I’ve got the buttcrack recipe.
    Or at least I THINK I do, bcse all three of my kids HAVE buttcracks, so I know I USED to know how to make them.

  14. If one googles ‘olsen twins in duct tape and skirt’ this blog is the 2nd hit.

  15. all i know is that the moon is supposed to turn red like blood. the apocalypse

  16. Nah, cats don’t hibernate. They’re just like that all the time.

    You really do get some strange search terms. I need to look at mine again and see what the weirdos are searching for.

  17. I think the first sign is searches for wet poopy diapers and big girls.

  18. oh my how funny! I thought my search terms were bad, but nope babe – you won the award 😉

  19. What the heck kind of tags are you using for your posts?!!!

  20. My most disturbing search term lately was “karen carpener [sic] in casket.” I mean, who the hell wants to see that? I also get a ton of hits for people looking for Polish recipes or the lyrics to VeggieTales songs, thanks to my “Eight Polish Foods of Christmas” post a few years ago.

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