January 31, 2009 | Parenting, The Blue One
The same child who I have seen eat week old Teddy Grahams off the floor of my minivan refuses to throw up in a dirty bowl.
* throws hands up in the air and walks away*
Archive for January, 2009
January 30, 2009 | Doctor Doctor, Parenting, Son of a..., The Blue One, Twin Stuff
A lot of you are pregnant with your first child or are trying to get pregnant with your first child. If you fall into one of these categories you may want to hold off reading this particular post until your children are teenagers. I’m sure when we all all worried about teen pregnancy and drug use this will sound charming.
***
Ian threw up in my bed last night.
Thrice.
Eventually we were on our last set of clean sheets (I won’t even go into what happened in his bed) and he and I came out to the living room and slept on the floor.
I gave up got creative and gave him a bowl to throw up in when it became evident that he wasn’t ever going to make it to the bathroom in time.
To make a long and messy story short, I got about three nonconsecutive hours of sleep last night and odds are pretty good that this whole house smells like puke.
Here comes the strange part. It makes me a little bit nostalgic. Ian had reflux when he was a baby. I forgot that for eight months is was standard procedure to wash my sheets every single day because there was a 99.9% chance that he would ralph in my bed.
As I was throwing a load of soiled bedding into my washing machine in a sleep deprived haze I think I actually smiled.
Last night sucked but it was way easier than having infant twins. Sorry Nora. You will never hear me saying that I want to revisit that time in my life. Having a baby with colic and another baby with reflux was maddening, yet somehow we lived through it and now we have these amazing little people that only vomit when they are sick and only scream all night if I really piss them off. Plus, even though it was a huge pain in the ass, twin babies are very cute and at some point (I don’t remember exactly when it was, but I assure you it was after six weeks and before one year) they were even kind of fun, and at some much later point they started sleeping through the night.
So yeah, being puked on sucks but he also still cuddles up with me when he doesn’t feel well and that won’t last forever either and so for now I am willing to take the trade-off.
I Have Issues
Is it just me of does anyone else sit around wondering if this whole HFCS debacle is really just the result of the heir to the high-fructose corn syrups ex-girlfriend. Like maybe he cheated on her or something and she used to be his PR representative and she was really really good at it so instead of toilet papering his mansion or posting naked pictures of him on Facebook for revenge she just chose to bring down the entire HFCS empire.
Just me?
Fine then.
January 29, 2009 | Parenting
Most of the time I walk around feeling like a complete failure as a mother. This is partly because my kids weren’t potty trained until they were four, partly because they can’t read, and partly because nobody ever tells you that you are doing a good job as a mother unless you give them a piece of chocolate cake or take them to McDonalds for lunch.
Oh, and if you take them to McDonalds for lunch, even though the children might compliment your mad parenting skills there will be another grown up frowning at you for feeding your kids garbage for lunch.
That being said, every once in a while I can see I am actually doing something right. The daughter who wouldn’t leave my side for a year went happily to school with a neighbor while I stayed home with her sick brother.
She didn’t complain. She was excited to go to school after two snow days in a row.
She also made some art for her grandmother the other day and asked for an envelope and a stamp. I wrote all the information on piece of paper for her and she copied down the address onto the envelope.
And I could read it.
This morning she got dressed all by herself. The outfit was weather appropriate and it sort of matched. Then she put her pajamas in her hamper without me nagging her to do so.
She slid on the ice and fell down on her butt no less than five times on our short walk two houses away and she was cool with it. It wasn’t a big deal.
This is the same girl that cried every single day I dropped her off at school when she was two. This is the girl who has to sit next to me at every meal. The little girl who told me I was ruining her life because I made her wear gloves in the snow. The girl who refused to go to school for two weeks because her twin brother had his tonsils and adenoids taken out and she wouldn’t go alone. The same little girl who wouldn’t go outside and play in the snow the first year and a half we lived here because she hated it so much.
Somehow we have brought her this far.
Sometimes I feel like I’m not so bad at this parenting thing after all. (more…)
January 28, 2009 | Parenting, The Goon Squad
The other day as I found the missing Didj games with my super mom powers I said to my children “See? Don’t you have the best mother in the world?”
And they said “No. YOU have the best mother in the world.”
Those little ingrates are probably right.
