Anytime I go to a blogging conference I tell people that I am exactly what you would think by reading my blog but I say a lot more bad words in real life.* This is true. In real life I spend most of the day trying not to curse like a sailor in front of [...]
And There is No “M” in Valentines Day
February 11, 2009
A lady walks in to an ice cream shop. “May I please have a chocolate ice cream cone.” says the lady. “I’m sorry ma’am,” says the man behind the counter “We don’t have any chocolate.” “Okay.” says the lady “Then I’ll take a scoop of chocolate in a cup.” “Ma’am,” he says “You must have [...]
On Children and Vaginas
February 9, 2009
I have no idea what I was thinking. I have always tried to be completely honest with my kids but I think maybe babies coming out of vaginas may be a more on a need to know basis for small children. Let me back up a little bit. When my children were old enough to [...]
Desert My Eye
February 9, 2009
Ever since I was a young child I have been under the impression that the desert was a dry place. A place where people had to use a lot of lotion and make sure that they were drinking enough water. I don’t have the research in front of me, but I believe that you have [...]
Sunday Morning
February 8, 2009
Sunday Morning Originally uploaded by Sarah606 If you had said to me “You will be spending some of your Sunday morning in Las Vegas watching “Smokey and the Bandit” in your bathroom mirror.” I would have said “I have no idea what you are talking about.”
Why Is Chris Mortensen In My Bathroom?
February 6, 2009
Believe it or not there is a television in the bathroom mirror at my hotel. Does this seem unusual to anyone else? I mean you can’t really see this mirror from the shower and I don’t use the toilet THAT much. I guess it would be convenient during The Super Bowl but the rest of [...]
I’ve Heard of Cabin Fever, But This is Ridiculous (Questions for You)
February 5, 2009
I don’t mean to be a whiner, but I have only left my house twice in the past 10 days and both times it was to the grocery store and back. Tack a full week onto that and you will have the number of days since both of my children have gone to school and [...]
Really? I’m Not Seeing the Connection
February 3, 2009
In my never ending quest to win things from search engines I came across this: As far as I can remember, Lil Wayne and I have never met and I’m fairly certain we are not related. I’ve never even heard of Bumpy Johnson, but it sure makes me laugh. Yes, I’m still a 12 year [...]
Possibly the Work of the Devil
February 3, 2009
I’m talking about Kidz Bop. As if the hits of today didn’t already suck bad enough. How could children singing poorly written pop songs possibly make them more palatable? What parent in their right mind would purchase a Kidz Bop cd and then allow their child to listen to it in their presence? Maybe it [...]
4/4 Time
February 2, 2009
Two weeks ago I wrote this and it has been sitting in my drafts folder. I wasn’t tagged for it but I kept seeing this meme where you looked in the fourth folder where you keep pictures and then you post the fourth picture in that folder and talk about it. The fourth picture in [...]
Life Should Not Imitate “Trainspotting”
February 2, 2009
I won’t go into the gory details but nothing could have prepared me for what I woke up to last night, except maybe that one scene in “Trainspotting”. Not the toilet swimming scene, not the one with the dead baby, but the one where Spud wakes up at his girlfriend’s house. Note to parents of [...]
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