The Babymoon Mystery

Have you heard of these babymoons? People who go on vacation when they are pregnant with their first child to have some last time alone, just the two of them?

I think this is something that people have only been doing for four years tops because I had never heard of such a thing when I was with children.

Now, I realize that I was sicker than most people are, and that being pregnant with multiples is different than being pregnant with one baby and that I don’t know the first thing about being pregnant with one baby.

However:

What kind of lunatic would want to go on vacation when they were pregnant?

When I was 20 weeks I stopped fitting in my Honda Civic and some people get on an airplane and fly to an island? I couldn’t even sit through a movie without peeing seven times, and I don’t know that I could have physically been able to shut the door on an airplane lavatory.

Well, that and all of the barfing.

We flew to Tahiti with a friend (who had not planned on being pregnant on our vacation, but found herself in that predicament anyway) and she was only seven or eight weeks pregnant and the smell (it was a French airline, if you know what I mean) had her puking the whole way there.

It was a seven hour flight from LAX to Papeete.

I felt so bad for her.*

But maybe that is why I didn’t dare step foot on an airplane when I was expecting. I missed Thanksgiving at the beach and a good friend’s wedding because I was too sick to fly in my 18th week.

On the day of Allison’s wedding I felt awful that I couldn’t be there. Then I threw up four times in the grocery store and knew that I had chosen wisely.

I don’t mean to judge. If you went on a babymoon and enjoyed it, I am happy for you. But I am curious how you made it through the flight.

* If you ever want to make Erin vomit be sure and bring up a “pork buffet”. That should do the trick.

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  1. sueinithaca says:

    We went on one, if you can count my accompanying my husband to a conference a babymoon. It was in Santa Barbara, so it kind of counts.

    I was 7 months pregnant. I am a tall, big-boned Midwestern farm girl, who had packed on a good 30+ pounds by then. Suddenly plopped in the middle of movie-star emaciation. What a great way hang on to that pre-child feeling of desirability, right? Not so much.

    I do recall having fun on the trip, HOWEVER. The things I recall most are watching the first Harry Potter movie in a beautiful restored theater but being unable to sit at all because my sciatica was acting up, and the fact that my first-class seat (upgraded with precious precious air miles) did not recline, so I could hardly breath from sitting ramrod straight in the plane much of the way from California to NYS (someone did eventually pity me and switch seats, but I think I cried first).
    That, and an unbearable craving for my grandma’s fried clams, but no one in CA makes food like southern Ohio farmers, believe it or not (grandma lived in New Orleans in the 40’s while Grandpa was fighting, is how the clams came about. otherwise, she’s all-pork-all-the-time).

    So yeah, I agree. I don’t really get it. We had fun and all, BUT.

    Well, clearly I didn’t learn because when I was 7 months pregnant with my second, we went to Beijing for two weeks, toddler in tow. And that time we flew coach.

  2. I flew to London at 7 mo pregnant and spent the entire week in bed with debilitating leg cramps.

  3. I didn’t go on one, but I didn’t have any morning sickness, figured it was my reward for it taking 4 years, 2 ivfs, a micarriage and ectopic to get pregnant. And for #2 I didn’t. even know I was pregnant for 15 weeks, I know, weird. Couldn’t have had a trip anyway, what with the infant at home :) I did go on some business trips, and planes and texas heat made my ankles swell, but otherwise wasn’t too bad. Oddly I sort of wanted morning sickness, since I worried that my lack of symptoms meant I would lose the baby.

  4. When pregnant (and puking) we went

    1-To Chicago for a week
    2-To Anaheim for a week
    3-To San Diego for a week
    4-To DC for a long weekend (twice)
    5-To NYC for a long weekend

    The only thing that really sucked was not being able to
    1-get in hot tubs
    2-ride GOOD rides at Disneyland

  5. On the topic of being hugely pregnant, when I was 8ish months pregnant with my twins (babies # 2 & 3 of 5) my brothers brought a friend to my house. “Mere, this is our friend. We told him he had to come she how huge you were. He didn’t believe us.” That’s right, I was a circus sideshow.

  6. We went to Cabo San Lucas on a super romantic trip when I was about 25 weeks pregnant with my first. My husband won it through work and it was all expense paid so we were GOING. I swelled up like a balloon and could not wear shoes the entire week.

    This year he won a trip to Hawaii and if we have to use two condoms at a time I will NOT be pregnant when we go! (In Feb)

  7. There was about a two week window in both of my pregnancies during which I actually felt good enough to even think about going anywhere. We didn’t go anywhere.

    At this point, if I went on vacation, my couch would send a postcard to my ass saying “Wish you were here.”

    The only place I want to go is to Holy Cross to get this kid out of me. I’m deeply concerned, however, that when it is actually time to do that, none of my pants will fit me.

  8. I traveled with both pregnancies, but I was never sick. Huge, but not sick. (And I mean HUGE.) They were not babymoons though because we already had the Girl.

  9. I went on vacation when 7 months pg. We went to AZ for a week. That was nice, spent it in the pool which was pure bliss. Don’t remember anything bad about the flight there.

    BUT – we went with SIL & BIL and they both wanted to go to Vegas for a night during the week. Biggest mistake I ever made in my life.

    121 degrees on the strip, waddling.

    I cried 3x.

    First outside the Venetian. I had blisters, I was drenched in sweat, and I was starving. BIL thought someone had punched me.

    2nd time was about 10 minutes later after walking through the Mirage to get to the buffet. I was being held together by a thinnest thread – the promise of food. Got to the buffet and the line was no lie a mile long. I LOST IT. I believe I also screamed “I HATE THIS F’ing PLACE!”.

    3rd time was leaving on the flight. Lady 1 row in front of me, to the right had a seat covered in puke. The smell alone was sending my stomach into convulsions. A tech had to come in and install a new seat. When he had removed hers and was getting a new one, I got up to pee. Stewardess (aka the Devil) wouldn’t let me. We were “going to take off soon”. Um ya – SHE DOESN’T HAVE A SEAT!! Refused to let me pee. I bawled like a baby for the 45 minutes we sat on the tarmac and until we reached the cruising altitude. I actually wrote a scathing letter to Southwest regarding that one.

    Horrible, just Horrible.

  10. Personally I don’t “get” the whole babymoon phenomenon, either. (Though wouldn’t THAT make great reality tv…) I’ve also never found airports or airport security or customs particularly relaxing.

  11. Not to mention I had Declan at 32 weeks. That would have been fun on an island.

  12. I don’t consider it a vacation unless I’m drunk, so I’m with you on the whole mystery thing.

    I just had dinner with a pregnant friend though who said she loves being pregnant and is one of those beautiful annoying glowing pregnant women. Which is why she was on a trip to DC. Whatever.

  13. i thought a babymoon was when you get pregnant on your honeymoon.
    heh.

  14. Chris and I went to Spain during the second trimester of my first pregnancy. Other than the fact that I walked all over with one hand in my maternity jeans to hold them up, it was great. (Oh, and I got myself locked in a restaurant bathroom, but that is another story.)

    With the twins there is no way I could have done that – too tired, too big, etc. In a “regular” pregnancy the second trimester is a good time to get out and about as most women feel pretty good. Maybe Chris and I will do a delayed babymoon when the twins are 2.

  15. Greenpixie says:

    We did it accidentally – found out the day before a two-week trip to England/Scotland that I was knocked up. Biggest bummer was not being able to drink my way through the trip, as had been the plan, and then of course the wonderful nausea and exhaustion kicked in and made the touristy stuff a bit… challenging… luckily I didn’t start puking until two days after we got home. Makes a good story, but still.

  16. I traveled wehn I was five months pregnant with my first. It was a family reunion in central Texas in June (did I mention the family was Polish?)While I was fortunatel to have missed out on most of the morning sickness, the heat and humidity were pretty bad at times, and that’s saying a lot coming from a Vegas chick.

  17. As you know, I just got back from a trip back home. It helps that I dont have any of that nausea business or not too big yet. Twins would be different. I wouldn’t want to do it late in my third trimester either as I’m just now beginning to feel her weight on me.

  18. thanks. now i feel sick. i’m not kidding.

  19. Have never heard of this either.

    Considering I was on 4 months of bedrest with my twins a babymoon was clearly not in the cards.

    I think I shall take a kidmoon though. That’s sounding kinda good right now. A little break/vacay from crazy 6 year olds …Hmmm

  20. I was never sick with my twins, so I probably would have gone somewhere if I had had the opportunity. Ya know, assuming I could have fit into a car, SUV, limo, airplane or any other variety of transportation.

  21. I had friends that threw up every ten seconds with one child, thankfully not me. Also, we went to NY when I was 20 weeks pregnant, not as a babymoon though. I was fine until the plane needed to circle the airport before landing. I didn’t throw up, but cried the second Jeff asked how we were!

  22. Who says you have to fly to go on a babymoon? Oh, and the concept has been around for at least 8 years. My wife and I went on a babymoon in the spring of 2001 along with some good friends of ours who were also pregnant (and ended up having their son the same day as our oldest son was born). We just went for a drive down the California Coast and stayed in a nice beach hotel in Pismo Beach for the weekend. We had a wonderful weekend getaway together, but it wasn’t anything as extravagant as a HONEYmoon. Although both pregnant women in our foursome had some odd food tastes while they were pregnant, neither were really getting sick at all.

    Anyway, the short answer to your question was: Yes, we’ve heard of a babymoon and we went on one in 2001. :-)

  23. OH my gosh, seriously…I was JUST talking about this with that guy I married. I said, “If I were going to go on a babymoon, I’d go ALONE. NO you, NO Dawson, NO dog. Just me, a novel and lots of food and drink and total control of the freaking remote.”

    I think he was hurt.

    I told him he know hurt until HE can give birth.

  24. Crap. I meant to say “he won’t know hurt until He can give birth.”

    I’m sure you knew that.

    Freaking hell…can’t even type.

  25. Been on two babymoons. My first one was booked before we knew we were expecting, and was marred by the progesterone suppositories that I had to ‘insert’ while we were away. Kinda killed the mood.

    The second one was great as it was during the all-you-can-eat trimester. As an added bonus, no need to suck in the gut while in swimwear!

  26. I was miserable most of my pregnancies. Nothing totally out of control, but I would have felt like I was wasting money if I did anything vacationy.

  27. I have a friend who went on babymoon and didn’t enjoy it as well. She didn’t have problems with morning sickness or with vomiting, but her hormones went crazy. They ended up fighting all the time. LOL! Hope your morning sickness will get better soon!

  28. Michelle says:

    Sarah, these are all people who were obviously not sick like you and me. My babymoon was pushing you around the hospital at 9 months pregnant. I still think stopping at Dairy Queen on the way back to Wellswood from N. Tampa was the bomb.

    Then even if I wasn’t sick all of our money went into fixing up our house. I think we had more fun going to Europe for a wedding the next year with Gabriel.

  29. If I’d gone on a babymoon, I’d probably have spent it puking, as that was the only thing I really excelled at while pregnant.

    A friend had tried to “make me feel better” (her and my husbands idea) by taking me to my favorite local beach. I took my bucket. It was not for playing in the sand. My friend didn’t suggest more outings after that. There was no way anyone could have gotten me on a plane.

    I was pregnant with one.

  30. I had a pretty easy pregnancy. Yes, you may hate me. Twins, and no morning sickness.

    However, I was banned from flying by my ob-gyn and didn’t make my 5-year college reunion. Essentially, she said, “Travel at your own risk, but if those babies show up while you’re away, you get to stay wherever you are.” When the girlies showed up 7 weeks early, I was glad I hadn’t flown. There’s nothing like the comfort of your own bed when you have two little ones on the NICU.

  31. Lumpyhead's Mom's friend Sarah says:

    I had an easy pregnancy, so did my usual amount of flying without issue. When I was 4-5 months pregnant we went to Europe because my husband had never been, and we figured it would be our last chance in a while (we actually went again two years later with our 2-year-old and two teenage nieces, so we are clearly brave and foolhardy people), and tromped all over Paris, Prague, and Germany. Flying was fine, but taking the overnight train from Paris to Munich and sharing it with 3 snoring men (only one of whom was my husband) was the worst travel-related 12 hours of my pregnancy.

  32. “french airplane!” holy shit, I’m dying over here! ahahaha!

  33. I can see if it’s your first child trying really hard to have a good time.

    BUT ALSO there is another usage of the term babymoon…it’s the time right after you have your baby when you just cuddle and hold them and no one bothers you. LOL

  34. We drove to Kansas City for the weekend a month or so before I was due to see Bruce Springsteen one night and Kenny Wayne Shepherd the next. Does that count as a babymoon? I dunno, but it must have had an impact on Josh in-utero because the kid sings in the shower and loves music.

  35. We went on a trip when I was pregnant, but I’d never heard the term “Babymoon”. We went because my husband finally returned from being deployed overseas and we wanted to get away with no distractions. Truthfully? It sucked. We drove from Oklahoma to Denver and I was miserable. I remember puking in a men’s bathroom because the line was too long for the women’s. I couldn’t do any of the fun things on the trip (think Coors Brewery or the Alpine Slide in Breckenridge), but it WAS nice to get away one last time together.

    However, I would much recommend waiting until after the baby is born and a little older, then going on a trip alone while kiddo hangs out with grandparents. Then you can drink all the beer you want and if you vomit it’s only because of alcohol.

  36. My BFF actually went on a Babymoon. Except, it was a drive to Madison, Wisconsin to watch a Wisconsin football game to see her husband’s cousin. So really, besides staying in a nicer hotel, the trip was really for him.

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