When I was brushing my teeth and putting in my contacts this morning my children were making their breakfast and talking off their clothes.
As I walked down the hall I could hear them singing: Happy birthday to me, I’m 103, I’m still in pre-school and I am naked.
It isn’t their birthday, they are out of pre-school and it isn’t a very good rhyme but the unclothed part was true.
Both of them were sitting at the dining room table butt ass naked and eating bagels.
(Butt ass naked sounds right in my head, but looks crazy typed out like that.)
See Mommy! We’re naked!
Then they laughed like it was the funniest thing that had ever happened. I smiled at them, put the cream cheese back in the refrigerator, made some coffee and then announced it was taco day at school as if everything was normal.
Because at least they weren’t fighting or crying.
It turns out that nudity is something I can handle in the morning and you know what else? Nobody got on the bus with food on their clothes today.
I would say over all that the naked breakfast, although completely unexpected, still made more sense than “Naked Lunch.”