Laundry Detergent and Farts

I have left the house three times today and each time I got into my vehicle I had the same reaction.

So I did what anyone would do. I told twitter.

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Later I thought, huh. Maybe I should explain that.

The story starts last week when my neighbor and I went to Costco. I had to buy a big pork loin for work.

Now, some of you are just nodding your head and reading. Some of you are wondering what kind of person has to buy a seven pound pork loin for work. I say, the kind of person who blogs about pork for money. I know my career path is not the normal one and I accept that. I think the neighbors view me as somewhat of a sideshow and I accept that too. I don’t know many other people that when asked how work was this week can say “Good. I got three people to go see Duran Duran in Toronto, I wrote an essay about losing a post, the redesign for the sports site is up, I made t-shirts for the elementary school’s drama club and I wrote a post about smoking some pork.”

Life is good.

Weird, but good.

Anyway, my neighbor and I went and bought a bunch of big things at Costco. When we got home I mostly unloaded my car. I didn’t bring in the two pound box of Cheez-Its or the massive 96 load thing of Tide.

Guess which one leaked.

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I was pissed off too because that was $21.99 worth of laundry detergent. I’d say $ 7.50s worth is still in my trunk and the rest is in my yard.

Really, the neighbors adore me.

Even after my very, very half assed attempts to get the laundry detergent out of the way back the car has still the distinct and overwhelming smell of Tide.

Until today. I don’t know what rotted in there, but the car smells like Tide and farts. I’d air it out but it won’t stop raining.

I’m actually still a little bit puzzled as to how we walked around Costco for a good 20 minutes leaking something bright blue without noticing it. For now I will just assume that I somehow busted it putting it in the trunk and stop stressing out about the $21.99 that is killing my lawn instead of making my clothes smell like a mountain spring.

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Related: Does anyone have any great advice on how to get soap out of upholstery?

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  1. The farts smell is probably some stray bit of food one of the goons shoved in a seat crack (heh-heh, crack) or something. One week last spring I had a mystery odor in my car, only to discover a doggie bag from a dinner out the week prior under the passenger side front seat. Ugh.

  2. When I was moving earlier this year – February – a bottle of Mop-and-Glow let go in my trunk. My trunk still smells like floor cleaner.

  3. Remind me sometime to tell you all about the time I left a half gallon of orange juice in my trunk and then went on Spring Break. In Florida.

  4. Mine smells like rotted milk. Always. I don’t know, tide may be a better smell.

  5. This is why I buy unscented laundry detergent. Because that kind of shit always happens to me.

    At least your lawn will be mountain fresh. That’s something, right?

  6. Ironically, soap is incredibly difficult to clean.

  7. smart aleck says:

    I’d rather smell the Tide than the rotten chicken smell that was in my kitchen one time–I was rearranging the freezer and fridge after shopping, stuck the chicken on top of the fridge and did not find/remember it until the morning.
    When the smell found me.

    Some things can never be unsmelt.

    So, at least your car smells like soap.

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