When I told somebody that my notary was in Aruba I thought it was probably the most ridiculous sentence that had ever come out of my mouth.
It was true (if by my notary you mean my friend who I just found out was a notary, but he lives really close to me and he will be back in three days) it just sounds really uppity.
So I am thinking, well at least I won’t say anything that sounds weirder than that for a while.
Because when a restaurant I have been trying to get into for – well, forever – called me and said they had a cancellation tomorrow night at 9:30 I said “My babysitters are in Burma.”
My babysitters are in Burma.
Oh, I said it.
It sounds like a lie for so many reasons. One, who goes to Burma? Two, who has more than one babysitter in Burma at one time? Three, can’t you get another babysitter?
Well, yeah, but not one that wants to hang out my house until one o’clock in the morning. I have training babysitters for when the grandparents go out of town but they are really young and I feel like a jerk staying out too late.
I can’t wait to hear what I say next. I wonder if my accountant is out of town?
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That title sounds filthy! Who lets me choose my own headlines?