March 28, 2008 | All This and Culture Too, Other Bloggers

This cast belongs to MammaLoves. I have a picture that looks just like this but you can see her beautiful smiling face in. She however, claims it is a picture of her ass. And yes, you can see her ass in it so since I don’t want her posting a picture of my ass on the internet and since she will be at my house tonight and have the opportunity to take a picture of it, I choose to respect her wishes.

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On Tuesday (right before my blog went completely off line due to hosting issues) I metroed down to The Smithsonian stop to meet the lovely and hilarious BOSSY.

BOSSY was able to spot me right away since 1) We’d met before 2) I was wearing a bright red hoodie and 3) I told her to look for the person that looked like me in the bright red hoodie.

Then we rushed off to The National Gallery to look at some art because we are very cultured. We established a mutual dislike for Mary Cassatt and that “That Guy” as in Hey! Look. It’s the picture of that guy. Was in fact Vincent Van Gogh.

Then BOSSY muttered something that could have been about art but I said “Did you say a glass of wine?” and so we rushed off (Screw it. The National Gallery is free.) to have a relaxing drink.

You know, before we had to meet the other for the the drinks that were less relaxing?

You know how nervous I get around other bloggers!

We found another metro station. Easily found our stop and then got lost.

Here is a reenactment.

Sadly, the last picture happened at the exact same time as my head turned pear shaped and my eyes got way to close together.

But all was well and some nice man told us where our next bar could be located and when we got there some superfly people were already waiting for us.

You can read about that part here or here because I sat on the end and mostly talked to people I already knew. It was really LOUD in there.

Fun was had by all and now I know what Van Gogh looks like. Plus DC was the first stop on the tour so now I know for sure that we are #1.

November 22, 2007 | All This and Culture Too, Music, Parenting

Do you want to know what rules about being back at the house you grew up in for Thanksgiving?

When your son’s cool new “binoculars”:

Turn out to be your autographed Paul Gilbert (of Mr. Big and Racer X fame) poster, circa Cereal Killer.*

Then your husband makes fun of you a lot for being such a dork.

And you know you deserve it.

- Have a great Thanksgiving.

_____________________

* And yeah, it says: “To Sarah, Twist and Shout”. So I am not the only dork, am I Paul Gilbert?

November 19, 2007 | All This and Culture Too, Music

CHARACTERS

ME: A suburban mom

20ISH GUY: a Barnes and Noble Employee

30ISH WOMAN: another Barnes and Noble Employee. Possibly 20ISH GUYS boss.

[A Barnes and Noble in Tampa, Florida. The suburban mom walks into the music section of the store. The 20ISH GUY approaches the new customer.]

20ISH GUY: Can I help you find something ma’am?

ME: Yes. I am looking for the new Dethklok album.

20ISH GUY: [puzzled] Death? Clock? [Trying not to laugh. You he was expecting her to be looking for the Josh Groban Christmas CD.]

ME: [beginning to feel uncomfortable, sort of] Yes. I think it is called the “Dethalbum“. It is a two discs.

20ISH GUY: [goes to the counter and approaches 30ISH WOMAN and a computer. Then, to the woman:] Death Clock? [he starts typing]

ME: I think it is D-E-T-H-K [She stops spelling because she is feeling really stupid.]

30ISH Woman: What is Death Clock?

ME: It is a band from a cartoon. It could be under Metalocalypse.

20ISH Man: What kind of cartoon?

ME: You know, one on Adult Swim. It is about a Death Metal band that is the third largest economy in the world. [At this point she just feels like a lunatic. Wants to leave the store.]

30ISH WOMAN: Here is an adult swim DVD…

20ISH GUY: OH! Dethklok. It’s one word.

ME: [Looking around furtively, just trying to escape.]

30ISH WOMAN: Huh. Okay “The Dethalbum“. We don’t have any, but I can order it for you.

ME: No thanks. I don’t live here.

[Suburban Mom runs away. Employees mock her once she is gone. Suburban Mom feels like an idiot and goes home so that she can tell the internet all about it.]

THE END

November 15, 2007 | All This and Culture Too, Music

Chris from Rude Cactus called me hip the other day. Clearly that solidified the fact that I would do something insanely dorky that day proving how uncool I really am.

Take for example this conversation that Gabe and I had about the singer from System of a Down and his new solo album.*

Me: You know, Serj. I can never remember his last name. What is it anyway?

Him: I don’t know - Ptolemy?

Me: I was going to say Tarkenton.

The real answer is Tankian.

I think.

Either way it is a good album.

*You could also take for example the fact that I had to e-mail The Kaiser to photoshop a picture of Serj Tankian’s head on Fran Tarkenton’s body.

Thanks Kaiser. This post wouldn’t even be funny without the picture. Although I could easily be the only one who thinks it is funny in the first place. 

July 17, 2007 | All This and Culture Too

One of the coolest parts about living in this area is that I get to go to shows at The Kennedy Center.

I just got back from seeing “The Phantom of the Opera” there.

I know you people that live in New York and get to go to The Met or Carnegie Hall and get to see shows on Broadway all of the time aren’t impressed, but I love the Kennedy Center. It is really beautiful.

One of the things I want to do before I die is go to the annual Messiah sing-along that they have every year.

Shut up. I never said I was cool, but I have repeatedly stated that I speak just to hear the sound of my own voice.

Do you want to know one of the other nice things about The Kennedy Center? You can use the Washington Monument and The Lincoln Memorial to figure out where the hell you are when you get lost driving in D.C.

My birthday is in December if anyone wants to buy me a GPS.