My Minivan Has a Poltergeist

My minivan has a poltergeist or possibly an electrical problem but either way I am freaking out. I was at the grocery store (as I tend to be) and when I tried to get out of the car it was locked. That in itself is no big deal. I’ve also tried to get out of […]

Ride The Wienermobile

When we walked down to the lobby the concierge said “Can I help you ladies?” I said: “Yes. This might sound strange, but I am looking for the Wienermobile.” All three of us stifled back some laughter and he said “Actually, I know exactly what you are talking about and it was parked out front […]

On Handwriting

This is for Beth. Feel free to play along.

My Poltergeist is Back

They’re Here. Really, they’re back. And this time they like Beck. Let me explain. I had an incident about two years ago when my tv would just turn off all by itself.  I blamed paranormal activity (not the movie, but the phenomenon). That all stopped when we got a new tv. Coincidence? Probably not, but […]

My New Nemesis: The United States House of Representatives

Dear U.S House of Representatives, Why must you hate? Is this because I called you the lower house? I want you to know I didn’t make that up as an insult. They taught me that in school. And I don’t know what you heard, but what I said was that we should legalize slots.

Cheese Powder

That’s right. You heard me. I named my post cheese powder. What of it? I have a theory about cheese powder having addictive properties akin to heroin. You think I am crazy. I give you the following examples: Cheetohs Doritos Ritz Toasted Chips, Dairyland Cheddar Flavor Planters Cheez Blass (their spelling, not mine) I challenge […]