Why Sledding Blows

We drive to the hill. My car almost gets stuck in the snow. There is this hill by our neighborhood pool. At the top of the hill there are tennis courts. At the bottom of the hill is the parking lot. This hill must be 45 feet wide and 15 feet up. There are stairs […]

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So remember when I said I was back? I wasn’t so much lying as I was misinformed. Karma had other plans for me most of which involve copious amounts of mucous and trying to argue with a five year old even though I barely have a voice. Right. In lieu of new thoughts, I’ll just […]

Don’t put it over the crack, Mommy

Don’t ask me how she did it, but Claudia scraped her butt on a tree. She was wearing jeans and climbing in a tree she knows she isn’t supposed to be in and somehow she has a huge scratch on her ass. I heard her crying outside, but since she has a fit about every […]

I Left My iPhone in Philadelphia*

I found myself standing in the rain in front of Union Station thinking to myself What kind of moron leaves her iPhone on the seat of the van? Of course the answer is THIS kind of moron. I remembered my backpack. I remembered the Nikon D90 that I am borrowing. I remembered my purse. I […]

Life Should Not Imitate “Trainspotting”

I won’t go into the gory details but nothing could have prepared me for what I woke up to last night, except maybe that one scene in “Trainspotting”. Not the toilet swimming scene, not the one with the dead baby, but the one where Spud wakes up at his girlfriend’s house. Note to parents of […]

The Upside of Vomit

A lot of you are pregnant with your first child or are trying to get pregnant with your first child. If you fall into one of these categories you may want to hold off reading this particular post until your children are teenagers. I’m sure when we all all worried about teen pregnancy and drug […]

Doctor, Doctor Gimme the News

Oh. Good. God. So I go to the doctor. Well, we go to the doctor. (Just one of the joys of being a stay at home mom.) As soon as I check in Claudia has to pee in the potty. Don’t get me wrong, I love it that she is peeing in the potty (finally) […]


I give up. I’ve had the flu for over two weeks. I’ve coughed so hard that I pulled enough muscles in my side that it actually hurts to breathe. I’m going to the doctor. I know – it is weak to go to the doctor for the flu, but I have no choice. I can […]

Silver Lining

After all of this sickness and suffering through the stupid flu – after being puked on and coughed at for three weeks – I am wearing my skinny jeans.