One time my mom called me all freaked out about geotagging. Apparently my sister-in-law told her that people could find out where you were by looking at a picture you took if you weren’t careful. Not only did I already know that, I clearly don’t care if people care where I am. You can tell […]

Being a Grown Up is Hard

When your kids tell the “What has four wheels and flies” joke over and over you would be surprised how difficult it is not to tell them the nun in a blender joke.

I’ll Never Grow Up

You know what word is funny? Boner. Yes, I know I am immature and I have embraced that about myself, but admit it. You laughed when you read boner didn’t you? Whatever, here is why I bring it up. During the Monday Night Football game this week (thanks a LOT Jets, you cost me my […]

Non Sequitur

The funniest joke I heard all day as told by my four year old neighbor, Todd: (Laurie and Suebob should stop reading now) Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Diarrhea. I turned my head as his mother scolded him for that kind of talk at the table because I was laughing and […]

Bon Jovi was Mistaken. The Hardest Part is not the Night.

The hardest part about being a parent – besides the sleep deprivation and all of the crushing responsibility – is keeping a straight face when I say things like “Pu-pu platters are not funny!” or “Nobody wants to see you shaking your butt all day long.” or “That isn’t really called an upper nut.” Full […]

Why? Why would I ever be her friend on Facebook?

You know, sometimes you think you are beyond something. You may not think about it for months at a time. It doesn’t seem like something that bothers you anymore but then there is that name and all the anger boils back up to the surface. I used to hold crazy grudges. There was a time […]

Ride The Wienermobile

When we walked down to the lobby the concierge said “Can I help you ladies?” I said: “Yes. This might sound strange, but I am looking for the Wienermobile.” All three of us stifled back some laughter and he said “Actually, I know exactly what you are talking about and it was parked out front […]

Command + Shift + 4

These made me laugh. That is all. via via

Reading Teacher of the Year, Right Here

I don’t think I told you about it here but I’ve been doing Hooked on Phonics with The Goon Squad. Since they started Kindergarten I have been sort of neglectful. Their teacher have been doing a great job and they have both been making huge leaps in reading and writing. Since the weather gods have […]

Also, My Dad Can Beat Up Their Dad

I’ve mentioned before that my Tae Kwon Do class is pretty much comprised of  me and a bunch of 4 – 7 year olds, right? I guess I am getting used to this. I was driving some of my friends from class home yesterday when we had the following conversation. TODD: I can run faster […]

What the Hell are They Teaching My Kids at That School?

This came home from school in Ian’s backpack this week. I’ve been laughing about it for three days. Let’s take a closer look, shall we? He swears it says Jack.

And Now I Understand Penis Envy

I didn’t know you could get free stuff for that sort of thing.