I remember what the doormouse said, I just have no idea what to do with that information.

Love,

Sarah

Why I am offended by the iPhone commercial.

A picture I took on a walk in my classy neighborhood. ————>

Why the Cincinnati Bengals pissed me off.

For $11.5 million, I will sell you two of my toes.

Now I am off to prepare for a birthday party for two six year olds. If you are a person of faith, pray for me. If you are not, please send beer.

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True story. Scott Ian from Anthrax is married to Pearl Aday, Meat Loaf’s daughter.

In related news, I can’t find a picture of these two together anywhere. How is it even possible that there aren’t any of Scott Ian’s wedding picture on the internet? Maybe I should try to friend him on Facebook.

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There is magic all up in this bitch.

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I was working on a rant about Tiki Barber leaving his wife (his 8 month pregnant with twins wife) leaving his wife for a 23 year old home-wrecking intern, when I found myself doing a google image search for “Tiki Barber Traci Lynn Johnson”.

The very last image hit on the first page caught my eye for two reasons.

1) That woman is not Traci Lynn Johnson.

2) I know for sure, because she is, in fact, my friend Kristen.

3) And I recognize that picture!

I assure you Kristen is no hussy intern,  no matter what Google Image Search says.

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2)

(via: Sparkle Motion)

3) They are remaking “Overboard” with J-Lo.

2. Lady Gaga

3. Calculus

4. People who think Keanu Reeves is a good actor

5. What is going on in this picture

6. genital piercings

7. the lure of Scientology

8. Why anyone would want a snake for a pet

9. How my son can play Spyro every day and never get sick of it.

10. WHY THE F IT WON’T STOP SNOWING

9 Reasons I Will Not Be Seeing “New Moon” in the Theater over at MamaPop

(hint, unrealistic looking werewolves is one of them)

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The Salvation Army and their bells are pissing me off. I will not donate a red penny (or penny of any other color for that matter) until they STOP WITH THE BELL RINGING.

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Do you think women will play in the NBA someday? I wrote about it over at BlogHer.

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And finally here are few search terms that have brought people to my fair blog recently

lord what have i done what have i done done

my eye hurts after last night drinking
Those last two may be related.

gang sign for ill be back

if you liek jonathan safran foer you should try
spellcheck?

zoosex confessions

drinking game like big booty
I thought I was the Queen of drinking games. Then I met some friends that went to Yale. Since I’ve never heard of the Big Booty drinking game I’ll consult with the drinking game masters.

Do they serve beer at March Madness?
Sadly, no. Something about NCAA sponsored events… Might I suggest doing what I used to do in High School and get wasted ahead of time?

antipope
Do you mean as in “I am the faggot antipope?“

women wearing shaped diapers
Shaped like what?

They used to call him “The Duke of Herb”.

David Cross is bragging about snorting cocaine near Barack Obama (from MamaPop).

And I am looking for a job.

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If you want to see some crazy mixed with bad grammar you should check out the comments on the post I wrote over at MamaPop when Michael Jackson died.

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Does any one here own a ton of Radiohead music?

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I’m looking for a Luke Skywalker Lego man for the boy. Besides ebay, does anyone know where I can get one without buying the $500 Death Star set? We went to the Lego store and they had no Lukes. Ian was traumatized.

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Only Matthew can be so sweet and so hilariously inappropriate at the same time.

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Cake balloon decorations gone wrong.

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Still funny.

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Have you checked out In Three Words yet? It is a really fun blog. Your comments have to be three words long.

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If you are a fan of women’s sports you shoud be reading Women Talk Sports.

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The Whinery is back. Sweet! An excuse to drink more wine!