7 Conversations About One Thing

Me: What shoul d we get Brian (The Goon Squad’s Aunt’s boyfriend) for Christmas?

Claudia: Well, we should get him something that he wants that he doesn’t already have.

(I thought that was astoundingly insightful for a three year old.)

Me: I think that is a great idea. Like what?

Ian: How about pasta!

Claudia: Yeah! Pasta!


Me: What should we get Daddy for Christmas?

Ian: How about a house?

Me: A house? We already have a house.

Ian: Well, maybe a toy house.

Claudia: A playhouse!

Me: You want to buy your father a playhouse for Christmas?

Both of the kids: Yes.


Me: What should we get Grandpa for Christmas?

Ian: SNAKES! Grandpa loves to eat snakes.*


Me: What should we get Papa for Christmas?

Claudia: A pig.pigs


Me: What should we get Nonny for Christmas?

Claudia: A pig.

Me: You want to get Nonny and Papa pigs for Christmas?

Claudia: A pet pig for Nonny. A regular pig for Papa.


Me: What do you guys think we should get Aunt K.C. for Christmas?

Both: A PIG!a pig


Me: What should we get Grandma for Christmas:

Claudia: A pig. Like the one we get for Papa.


* When the kids are trying to decide what to eat my Dad likes to suggest snakes for dinner. I don’t know why, but for some reason my children find this hysterical.

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  1. This kind of a pig or this kind of a pig or this kind of a pig? So many options, really.

  2. Bossy double-dog-dares you to do it.

  3. I think ALL their suggestions are Fabulous. What a fun Christmas it would be to buy all those pigs, and a play house for Daddy. Make sure you get a picture of him squeezing into his play house. LOL

  4. Pasta? WTF? Those two are a riot.

  5. If you go the pig route, I would strongly suggest getting a female. They are less agressive than the males. Tusk trimming is a hassle. Also Claudia is right, you definitely should get a pair instead of just one. Pigs are social.

    We had a male single pig. We had to eventually have a plan of adoption for him. While we loved him, he didn’t like sharing us with our son. Kid stayed, pig went.

  6. De in D.C. says:

    Will (7) suggested getting his dad a belt for christmas. I think a pig would be more fun to unwrap.

    Now that I’ve typed that out, I’m wondering if it is a sign of the times that kids no longer fear dad’s belt. I doubt Will would even know what “belting” means, other than to hold your pants up.

  7. Did Devra really have a pig?

  8. Hmmm…sounds like instead of steaks, they’ll be eating a lot of bacon.

  9. Yes. Devra really had a pig. We had him for 7 years. He was a Vietnamese potbelly pig. His name was Hamlet.

  10. Your conversation posts involving those kiddos SO make me look forward to when my daughter can carry on a conversation. So far, we’re limited to 3-word sentences that start with “I want.” It’s cute, but thanks to your blog, I know it’s gonna get a whole lot cuter.

    Susan at Working Moms Against Guilt

  11. Yes, quite insightful for a 3 year old…I notice they like to give edibles to people (is it weird that I include the pig in the edible category?).

  12. Absolutely fantastic. I just love their “natural” ideas.

  13. kelli in the mirror says:

    I highly recommend actually getting your dad a snake. Stuffed or whatever, but since he initiated it, start him a collection. My sister and I have forced a beaver collection on my mom for that same reason and it’s great fun.

  14. So are you going to buy the things they suggested?

    My husband took my almost 4 year old shopping last weekend and told me my son picked out one of my presents all by himself. I am a little worried to see what it is that he thinks I would want!

  15. On the snakes thing…whenever Petunia asks what we’re having for dinner, we tell her, ‘A big bucket of fishheads,’ which she thinks is similarly funny.

  16. My daughter asked for an alligator and a white rat for christmas. kids *sigh*. :)

  17. My standard reply to “what’s for dinner” is “pickled pig feet.” Sometimes I mix it up with “fried frog toes.”

    Please do not get me a pig for Christmas.

    And, Devra….Hamlet? Really? For a pig? That borders on cruel.

    I like the idea of giving pasta for Christmas. mk

  18. I never thought to ask the kids… ingenius!

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