As much as I like all of the Hello Kitty crap that someone somewhere is making a killing off of here is one thing I just cannot get behind.
The Hello Kitty Waffle Maker:
Ewww. The waffles look like little turds.
The guy in Target looked at me like I was insane when he saw me taking a picture of this with my phone.
True story: my real life friend Jeff is hiring Boy Shakira to “play” his friend’s birthday party:
Have you guys ever heard of swording? Seriously LHM is a prodigy at opening a champagne bottle with a knife. It is frightening.
What the F is a Nintendog? (not that I couldn’t just google it myself, but that isn’t nearly as amusing as asking you guys)
“Do NOT hit the microwave with that baseball bat”.
Seriously, nobody should ever have to say that again.
I think Oprah is stalking me.
First I start reading The Road and a week later Oprah makes it her book club suggestion, then the other day I mention Eat, Pray, Love
She is in my head!
Quick. Is she behind me right now? Is that her in the unmarked car across the street trying to peek at my book shelves?
Fine. I realize that these are not the most obscure novels written in English and that they were both most likely top 10 bestsellers already when Oprah recommended them. But I will tell you this right now – if this
Oh yeah, “and get up off ‘em” is a term I picked up off of Gabe a million years ago. I think it originated with ‘riding ones jock’. You know, getting off of one’s balls. Then again, it could mean something totally different. I’ve been accused of being a moron before.
I just tell stupid jokes, talk about Bob Guccione and trash the place.
THAT is why you shouldn’t let me guest blog.
Well, the joke still makes me laugh.
Every. Single. Time.
