February 17, 2010
Just when you think you have the most annoying song on the planet stuck in your head.
(NSFW)
Then your husband makes you listen to this.
To “assist” you in getting Die Antwoord “Enter The Ninja” out of your mind.
Yeah, so just when you think it could not possibly get any worse, you walk into Old Navy where you learn that some douchebag covered “More Than Words” and forgot that the only good thing about that song was the harmonies, so they sing it solo or you walk into a nail salon and hear a muzak version of a Santana song that sounds like it a robot was playing the sitar.
You might think you’ve hit rock bottom, but you would be wrong.
Because this is the worst thing – ever:
Oh, and I’m sorry. I forgive you if you are hitting unsubscribe. I deserve it.
Posted by Goon Squad Sarah @ 3:17 pm • Music
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February 17th, 2010 at 3:33 pm, Molly Says:
That Celine Dion thing is just…unspeakable. My brain needs a shower.
It rivals Kelly Osbourne singing “Papa Don’t Preach” in awfulness, and that is saying something.
February 17th, 2010 at 3:33 pm, Cass Says:
You know what’s brilliant about this? I was pretty sure up until I read this post that Lexi’s CRANK WHINING was the most awful thing I would hear today. But now you’ve made me love my child again. You’re doing good work here.
February 17th, 2010 at 3:40 pm, Wife and Mommy Says:
Celine Dion and Anastacia should NOT be singing that song. Oh my ears.
February 17th, 2010 at 3:44 pm, The Zero Boss Says:
I had to wait for “Enter The Ninja” to get annoying. Unfortunately, I didn’t have to wait long.
And may Celine Dion burn in Hell for eternity. I’m downloading the original now and playing it full blast. Until 8pm.
February 17th, 2010 at 3:48 pm, TwoBusy Says:
Am now dead.
Your fault.
February 17th, 2010 at 3:52 pm, PSPants Says:
The theme song to The Crying Game. Worst earworm in the history of time. All I have to do is look at Husband and it’s stuck in his head (please don’t read too much into that).
February 17th, 2010 at 3:55 pm, sueinithaca Says:
wasn’t paying much attention when i clicked on the Celine Dion thing and I thought she was Kathy Griffin for a minute (bear with me, we’re on school break week and my brain is fried from all the “working from home” I’ve been doing). I wish it had been Kathy. At least her abomination would have been hilarious.
February 17th, 2010 at 3:57 pm, kris Says:
I heart Celine!
I think the worst sound is that Potty Dance commercial that is ALL OVER teevee right now. I WILL NOT DO THE POTTY DANCE, MISTER, AND YOU CAN’T MAKE ME.
February 17th, 2010 at 5:18 pm, Sahara Says:
Oh my. But I think the “AIAIAI I am your butterfly” is the most insidious thing I’ve heard in a long time. I am totally forwarding this to the next person that crosses me. mwahahahaha!
February 17th, 2010 at 7:37 pm, Laurie Says:
Ninjas in my interwebs. I’m sort of a fan.
February 17th, 2010 at 10:14 pm, juliekirkwood Says:
That Celine thing. Thanks. I won’t be able to sleep now, what with the images stuck in my head and the earbleeding and all.
February 17th, 2010 at 11:47 pm, Melissa Says:
I love you and all your commenters. That Celine thing is awful, and that Get connected – for free – at Edu-cation connection…originally made me want to go deaf, but after awhile i looked forward to it during the 11pm That 70s Show and now its gone. and OMG the Potty Dance. W.T.F.
February 18th, 2010 at 2:10 pm, Jessica Says:
Wow….Celine Dion thrusting her hips has scarred me. You know, you can never un-see something. It will be etched in my brain forever.
February 19th, 2010 at 8:26 am, niCk Says:
“Oh, the humanity!”
“damn you! Damn you all to hell!”
February 19th, 2010 at 9:34 am, Elizabeth Says:
The scariest part of that Celine Dion video is the way the crowd is screaming their heads off, like they are just so thrilled to be watching her play air guitar and make weird faces. Although that leg kick thing she did at the beginning is pretty impressive considering the what, 5 inch heels?
Also, thank you very MUCH, Kris from NotYetAWino for putting that g*dd*mn POTTY DANCE song back in my head.
February 19th, 2010 at 11:30 am, Tito Says:
Was that a midget? I mean little person.
I object to Celine’s existance. She is wrong. I saw that she was on Oprah, I love Oprah so I decided to keep an open mind just long enough to witness the interview part. NO NO NO NO Wrong!! She sucks plus she is a wrong wrong wrong person. Shut up Celine!!
February 19th, 2010 at 3:13 pm, Matt L Says:
I have an unnatural hatred for Celine Dion. Just when I was thinking maybe I’m being to hard on her, I watched 10 seconds of that, and found that I had been justified all along. Thank you, Sarah.
February 19th, 2010 at 3:14 pm, Matt L Says:
(too hard) Oops.
February 19th, 2010 at 5:12 pm, js Says:
Hmm…got an error, hopefully won’t go through more than once.
I trust your judgement and respect my sanity enough (at the moment) to not listen to ANY of those right now. But those Education Connection commercials make me want to HURT SOMEONE! And sometimes the networks are super special and play two of them back to back. It’s like they’re TRYING to kill me.
February 20th, 2010 at 1:27 pm, Chicky Chicky Baby Says:
Damn, Sarah, I thought we were friends.
I can’t un-see/hear any of that. I’m going to have to go slam my head in a door repeatedly to try to rid my brain of those abominations. Thanks a lot.
February 20th, 2010 at 2:32 pm, Mocha Dad Says:
My head exploded after listening to these songs. Celine Dion should be arrested from crimes against humanity.
February 20th, 2010 at 2:46 pm, Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] Says:
I’m stealing that first song to be my theme song because I am the number one ninja.
I’ll be the ninja of annoyance.
February 20th, 2010 at 8:40 pm, del Says:
I have just been told by my husband “I am saddened, I may never be able to look at the internet again for fear of finding it!”
I fear if my son ever sees it, it will turn him off real music and become the emo that is hiding inside.
February 22nd, 2010 at 2:19 am, Beth F Says:
I want my 5:23 back. Now. And I am more than a little curious…how did this song get stuck in your head in the first place exactly?
February 22nd, 2010 at 10:51 am, Vicky Says:
WTF, Sarah, WTF?! I mean seriously. I started yelling at my own computer when Celine skipped “rocker” style across the stage. Ugh.
Can you get an eyeworm? I think I have one. I keep seeing her awkward dance moves playing over and over again in my mind. Thanks a lot.
February 23rd, 2010 at 7:47 am, Mac and Cheese Says:
I’m not even going to push play on the Celine one. It’s WAY too early for me to cope with whatever the consequenses are.
February 23rd, 2010 at 7:34 pm, Katherine (The Atomic Mom) Says:
There is no sound worse than that Education Connection jingle. Nothing in this world can compete with the horribleness that is that.
Even though Celine Dion is all kinds of awesome, she should never sing that song. Never.
February 24th, 2010 at 2:22 pm, heyjoe Says:
Good Lord, I hope AC/DC demanded a HUGE chuck of change to allow her to desecrate their song.