Setting: Claudia and I are in the kitchen unloading the dishwasher and and listening to my iPod on shuffle when “I Me Mine” by The Beatles comes on. Her: This isn’t a very good song. I don’t even like classical music.
Grass is Probably Symbolic of Something Too
My husband bought me a new lawn mower today and somehow this made me happy. It is shiny and red and I am thinking of buying flame stickers for it. My neighbor in kindergarten will be so jealous. * * * When I was 18 years old and a freshman in college I called one [...]
They Should Also Get Off of My Lawn
I am not going to call her out by name, but I was having a conversation with a person who I am close to that just so happens to be about 10 years younger than I am. I was asking if she thought I should wear pantyhose under my floor length bridesmaid dress. She said [...]
My New Facebook Friend, Chs Ninetyone
I just got a facebook friend request from Chs Ninetyone. What kind of name is Chs? I thought? Was Chris typing really fast? Then I said his last name out loud. “Ninety One.” Like Nineteen Ninety-One. The year I graduated from high school. Oh. Not Chs. C.H.S. Holy crap. They must be preparing for my [...]
Generation Gap
Ian was in the shower and spiking up his hair. I said “Are you making liberty spikes?” He said “What is a liberty spike?” I explained to him what a liberty spikes were and what a mohawk was. “You know your Dad used to have a mohawk. A purple one.” “No he didn’t. He had [...]
White Belt
You will never guess what I did. I signed up for Tae Kwon Do. Well, I was tricked into signing up for Tae Kwon Do. Let me back up a little bit. My five year old son has been dying to take Tae Kwon Do ever since he found out that his best friend at [...]
On The Upside, I Can Legally Buy Beer Now
Do you ever have those moments when you are suddenly sucked back in time and you simply cannot believe that you are a grown up? I was on a field trip today with The Goon Squad. We were at the zoo and we were looking at the big cats when I walked by a teenager [...]
On 36
I am going to be 36 years old in December. It doesn’t really bother me too much. I feel like I am in a very good place for my age. I have two children, a wonderful husband, a nice house, several jobs that I enjoy and good friends. Things are going well for me. Here [...]
Squint
Can anybody read the bottom line on the eye doctor’s little chart or is it just some sort of hilarious inside joke for Ophthalmologists?
Close but No Cigar
We TiVO 120 Minutes on VH-1 Classic. (1. Shut up. You’re not cool either. You know you have embarrassing season passes on your DVR too and 2) VH1 Classic, ugh. I’m so old.) The first couple episodes of 120 Minutes we watched were all about Morrissey and Siouxsie & the Banshees and a lot of [...]














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